Dating as a millennial can be very confusing and it's often quite challenging to find applicable advice. Sometimes it feels like there is no one who can relate to your unique dating scenario and that you might never find the answer you are looking for. But...I found someone who has been through it at all when it comes to relationships, and her name is Carrie Bradshaw.
Carrie Bradshaw, as we know it, is fictional. But being fictional doesn't mean she can't offer us good advice. In every episode Bradshaw is tangled up in some romantic mess, and somehow by the episode's end she's typing words of wisdom about her romantic endeavor for her latest column.
Every time I'm in a relationship rut, I turn to Carrie Bradshaw because she always has the answer I'm looking for.
1. “Life gives you lots of chances to screw up, which means you have just as many chances to get it right.”
So maybe you made a mistake so vast it terminated your relationship. And as stupid as you may feel, or as much as you wish you could take back what you did...you can't. Bradshaw said it perfectly: you have the chance to fix your mistakes. Being a millennial means we have plenty of time to date, make mistakes and learn from them.
2. “Maybe the past is like an anchor, holding us back.”
It's important to move forward in any relationship. Bradshaw reminds everyone that what happened in the past, is in the past for a reason. You can't go back in time and change your past, but you can look ahead to a brighter future.
3. “Sometimes we need to stop analyzing the past, stop planning the future, stop figuring out precisely how we feel, stop deciding exactly what we want and just see what happens.”
Life is one big question mark. As soon as I start to make plans, something major happens ruining every plan I made. The point is, we can't control how life plays out. It's hard to do, but analyzing and micromanaging every little thing is not possible, or healthy.
4.“Eventually all the pieces into place, until then laugh at the confusion, live for the moment, and know that everything that happens for a reason.”
It's important to take life how it is. No matter how hard a relationship or situation is right now, eventually everything will come together the way it's supposed to...you just can't see it yet.
5.“The most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you can find someone to love the you you love, well, that’s just fabulous.”
The worst decision you can make is to be in a relationship where you are settling. Don't ever be with someone who doesn't adore and think the world of you. If you find yourself changing values and the way you dress for a person, then you shouldn't be with him or her. There is someone out there who will wake up everyday and feel lucky to be in love with someone as perfect as you.
6. "He's not my boyfriend, he's just somebody I'm trying on."
There is no rule stating that every relationship has to be a long, serious event. Being involved with different people for short periods of time is healthy. Try on as many people as possible in order to find the perfect fit!
7. “We all get freaked out from time to time, but we keep trying because you have to figure, if the world’s fattest twins can find love there’s hope for all of us. Somewhere out there, there’s another little freak who’ll love us, understand us, will kiss our three heads and make it all better.”
There is someone for everyone. No matter how challenging or odd you may be, you will eventually meet your match.
8. “I revealed too much too soon. I was emotional slutty.”
Determining how much information you want to disclose in a new relationship is extremely hard. If don't talk about topics that are important to you, the person may never get to know the real you. But, if you disclose too much personal information right off the bat, don't be surprised if the person gets freaked out and runs for the hills.
9. “Maybe some women aren’t meant to be tamed. Maybe they just need to run free 'til they find someone just as wild to run with them.”
If settling down with a person isn't for you, then don't do it. Be single and independent for as long as you want. Then someday, maybe someone just as wild as you will walk into your life when you least expect it.
10.“They say nothing lasts forever, dreams change, trends come and go, but friendships never go out of style.”
Finally, no matter what the trends are, or who broke your heart, your friendships are most important. Your best friends are the people who will pick up the pieces of a broken heart or make you laugh when you need it most...don't take them for granted.