Here’s my story with high school relationships; I never had a boyfriend during high school. Not one.
Sure, there have been opportunities where I could’ve been in a relationship, but things always came up; he didn’t feel the same way, I didn’t feel the same way, the timing wasn’t great, we were better off as friends...you know, the typical excuses. It wouldn’t have been so bad, however, if all of my friends weren’t in relationships.
Looking back on it now, every single friend I had in high school didn’t have a boyfriend or girlfriend throughout all four years, but at the time it seemed like it. Of course, I was the victim of a lot of jokes, since I was dubbed the “third wheel” friend by many. It was even worse when they tried to set me up with people they knew, because even though there were good intentions behind it, it was horrifying for me.
Still, I wondered what it felt like to not be single. I wanted to know what it was like to be in a relationship with someone you care about a lot. The PDA I had seen during high school was unbearable, but I didn’t want someone for those purposes; just someone to go on adventures with, have inside jokes together, and to look forward to seeing them.
Yeah, I guess I outgrew the “boys are a waste of time” stage once I hit high school, despite what I’ve told my mom (she’s probably reading this right now, laughing her head off). But I graduated and moved away without an ex or a current boyfriend, ready to start a new life with a vital mindset: good grades and adjusting to college are important and I should not go out looking for people to date.
I stuck to it, believe me, but then something unexpected and incredible happened. Even though I wasn’t looking for a relationship, I ended up with a guy who was worth being with. It’s hard to describe, but it was almost like we were placed right in front of each other. The best part from this coincidence is that it didn’t affect my college goals at all, but rather enhanced it. It’s something special and rare, that’s for sure.
Now that I’ve experienced this, I’m glad I didn’t force a relationship in high school, because I’m almost positive it would’ve never felt like what I’m feeling right now. This “just-by-chance” kind of relationship may have happened with some of my high school friends, but it just took me a bit longer to experience it. It’s not a bad thing at all.
So, if you’ve never had a boyfriend or girlfriend, and if you’re a high schooler just looking for love, I would give you one piece of advice: wait. Don’t rush into these kind of things. Trust me, it may seem like a big deal now if all of your classmates are in relationships, but it’s not the end of the world. Someone will come along; it just might be a few months or years down the road.
But when you finally find someone at the right moment, it will be all worth it. I didn’t even know it until it happened, and honestly, I wish someone would’ve told me when I was back in high school. The least I can do is tell you now.
