Being a young, female adult, I have always had the desire of being able to call my boyfriend my best friend. I think this is a desire many young people face. Our society is so focused on love and the idea of dating, that we all feel so constantly pressured to quickly get ourselves into a relationship. Relationships that happen on the spur of the moment tend to not end too well, and I can relate to that. Of course I had my cute little relationships in middle school where I thought I was in love, but really, I had no idea what love even was or why I was in the relationship in the first place. This is all because I was pressed to believe that just simply being in a relationship made everything better. I never thought once about whether this boy was even right for me.
As I entered high school, I had multiple relationships that were nowhere near the kind that I could potentially see leading towards marriage. These relationships, like the ones in middle school, were given no thought before I entered into them. We are so quick to jump to the opportunity of having a boyfriend in our lives, that we end up making a decision that is not what’s best for us. The boys I dated in high school all ended up leading to short relationships because I did not build a friendship before becoming committed to them. I think this is one of the biggest mistakes females make in our society. We see what we like and we go after it. We don’t even think about building that sense of trust and friendship before actually dating because we are too strung up on the idea of “needing” a boy in our life.
Instead of taking things too fast, how about we take things slow for once and see what could happen. I took my own advice and went at it during my second semester of senior year. I knew of my boyfriend, but I never really saw him as a potential contender because he was rather short, but he does make up for it with his beautiful blue eyes. I ended up becoming fairly close friends with him. I simply enjoyed being his friend. I was able to get to know him as a person, without the awkward pressure of feeling like we needed to date. This allowed our friendship to run rather smoothly. We never really hung outside of school, so I never got the chance to get to know him in a different setting. However, I became a manager of our girl’s soccer team in high school, and he also did shortly after. We were not forcing our friendship at all. We both easily could tell we liked each other, but we wanted it to take its own course.
He eventually asked me to prom. I was able to see his fun and corky side, which got me to like him more and more as a person. I felt comfortable around him and I wanted to get to know him on a deeper level. With high school coming to an end, we never really attempted to date because there was no point since we both would be attending different colleges. We saw each other here and there over the summer, but not enough in my mind. I wanted to see him more, but I did not want to get attached before we would en dup being two hours away from each other. College started, and our talking stopped until one night I decided to start things back up with him.
Ever since then, we have been dating. We have had our struggles here and there because of the distance, but not once have we decided that we are not meant for each other. If people read our texts, they would just assume we were friends. That is the best thing about our relationship. We don’t have the sappy, lovey-dovey texts that everyone would assume would be in a conversation between a boyfriend and girlfriend. We are able to have real conversations, nothing fake. I am so happy that I started things slow with him because it truly took the pressure off of each of us. We were able to get to know each other because we wanted to, not because we felt forced. Having a relationship start as just a friendship will grow into something strong as it did for my boyfriend and I. I have never felt happier and more comfortable around someone like I do with him. He is truly my best friend. I can say whatever and do whatever around him. Those are the relationships I want all of us young women to be able to experience. Next time you want to enter into a relationship, be his friend first. It is worth it in the long run, and now I am happily blessed with the best.
P.S. If you are able to burp or fart in front of him, you know he’s the one, and also, your best friend.
