Dating in college is one of the most heart-racingly exciting things in the world.
Oh, I can feel it now: the stolen glances, the shocks of electricity when you touch hands, when you kiss.
There is longing and excitement in wishing you could spend all your time getting to know them; you're hoping they're wanting to get to know you too. So often though, one of you may get scared that things are moving too fast. Maybe your feelings are getting too strong, so you retreat from fear. What are you afraid of? Falling in love?
I know what you're thinking: "I am so young. There is so much for me to do! I can't fall in love right now. What if it doesn't work out?"
Sure, you're young. Yes, you have a lot to do. But, yes, you can fall in love right now, and it may not work out...but that's okay too. College is also so much a time for "finding yourself" and learning about what you love, hate, tolerate, and desire. If things don't work out, you will have survived through something that taught you more about life and about yourself.
Young adulthood falls roughly between the age of 18-30, and one of the most important milestones of this age is the formation and maintenance of intimate, romantic relationships. Maybe you had significant others in high school, but the emotional intimacy that is experienced in these new relationships are a different level. Erik Erikson, one of the fathers of developmental psychology referred to young adulthood as "finding oneself, yet losing oneself to another." This is the time to not only find out who you are and what you have to offer, but also time to offer it to someone else.
Do not bar yourself from falling in love.
Some pretty amazing things happen when you fall in love. Seriously, let the emotions and excitement wash over you because it is a beautiful feeling. More importantly, accept the impending heartache and disagreements that will stem from an emotional intimacy with someone. Allow their problems to become your problems, to a certain extent. Let your love grow, and let yourself affect the other person. Let them affect you; don't be afraid of changing because of their influence in your life. When things get uncomfortable and you begin to disagree, welcome the disagreement; you will probably learn something about yourself and your partner. Like everything in life, never reject your values, but question your opinions.
College is a time to fall in love, with yourself, with knowledge, with God, with nature, with the world around us. Somewhere in this world around us, someone is going to fall in love with you. I think you should let yourself fall in love with them too.
