The Darkest Secret Of Them All
Start writing a post
Politics and Activism

The Darkest Secret Of Them All

To people who say "rape isn't a real issue," this one is for you.

The Darkest Secret Of Them All
Huffington Post

*Rape Trigger Warning*
To all the people who try and say that rape isn't a real issue, this one is for you.

Pause. I can't breathe, I can't breathe because his hands over my mouth and he is pressing down.

His hand, his body. It's all that I can feel, and I'm paralyzed. Paralyzed entirely, I can't breathe. I can't fucking breathe and I just needed someone to help me. But nobody did because before I knew it, my skirt was being pushed up and he was pushing in. Invading me, and I stopped fighting it. My hands just laid by my side and eventually his hand relinquished from my mouth and all I could smell was his breath. Cigarettes and...I didn't want this. I didn't want this to happen but there I was, laying lifelessly as he took what he wanted from me.

Pushing inside of me, grunting as pleasure was being received from his end. Didn't he care? Didn't he care that I was just a little girl and I didn't want this? Didn't he get that this is all I had to ever give to someone? He was inside and it felt like time was slowing down, it felt like every scrap of who I was being shattered as he pressed his lips to my ear and told me to tell him that I liked it and as I refused, he reached behind me and took hold of my hair, yanking it back hard as he gave a hard push. "I told you to tell me that you fucking like it."

He demanded, and I gave in. I told him that I liked it as tears ran down my cheeks. He laughed at me, he laughed at the tears and began kissing across my neck. He acted like this was romantic like this was something that I planned. He acted like he wasn't raping me. There was nothing romantic about this, about him stealing from me.

"Fuck, you know you like this, you know it's exactly what you want..." He whispered as something began running down my thigh, at first I thought it was my body reacting until I saw the coloring was red and sticky. It was blood, and I closed my eyes and tried my hardest to place myself anywhere but here. No matter what, I was now the girl who was raped. He'll never know, but that day he took so much more than my virginity. He took away my peace of mind, he took a piece of me and left me with self-hatred and the constant need to feel clean. Clean of what he had done.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

2026: the year the Fifa World Cup Returns to North America

For the first time since 1994 the United States will host a world cup (for men's soccer)

2026: the year the Fifa World Cup Returns to North America
Skylar Meyers

The FIFA World Cup is coming to North American in 2026!

Keep Reading... Show less
Student Life

An Open Letter to Winter

Before we know it April will arrive.


Dear Winter,

Keep Reading... Show less
Student Life

6 Questions To Ask Yourself When Cleaning Up Your Room

This holiday break is the perfect time to get away from the materialistic frenzy of the world and turn your room into a decluttered sanctuary.


Cleaning isn’t just for spring. In fact, I find school’s holiday break to be a very effective time for decluttering. You’re already being bombarded by the materialistically-infatuated frenzy of society’s version of Christmas, Hanukah, etc. It’s nice to get out of the claustrophobic avarice of the world and come home to a clean, fresh, and tidy room. While stacking up old books, CDs, and shoes may seem like no big deal, it can become a dangerous habit. The longer you hang onto something, whether it be for sentimental value or simply routine, it becomes much harder to let go of. Starting the process of decluttering can be the hardest part. To make it a little easier, get out three boxes and label them Donate, Storage, and Trash. I'm in the middle of the process right now, and while it is quite time consuming, it is also so relieving and calming to see how much you don't have to deal with anymore. Use these six questions below to help decide where an item gets sorted or if it obtains the value to stay out in your precious sanctuary from the world.

Keep Reading... Show less

Why I Don't Write (Or Read) An "Open Letter To My Future Husband/Wife"

Because inflated expectations and having marriage as your only goal are overrated.

Urban Intellectuals

Although I have since changed my major I remember the feverish hysteria of applying to nursing school--refreshing your email repeatedly, asking friends, and frantically calculating your GPA at ungodly hours of the night. When my acceptance came in I announced the news to friends and family with all the candor of your average collegiate. I was met with well wishes, congratulations, and interrogations on the program's rank, size, etc. Then, unexpectedly, I was met with something else.

Keep Reading... Show less
Content Inspiration

Top 3 Response Articles of This Week

Meet the creators making their voices heard on Odyssey.

Top 3 Response Articles of This Week
Why I Write On Odyssey

At Odyssey, we're on a mission to encourage constructive discourse on the Internet. That's why we created the response button you can find at the bottom of every article.

Last week, our response writers sparked some great conversations right here on our homepage. Here are the top three response articles:

Keep Reading... Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments