Hmmm… The gears began turning in my head, and I started to think how our phones have become like this "mirror of desire," and how our own reflections become distorted. I thought that this metaphor deserved more consideration, but my primary goal was to finish the chapter and get all three of our kids to bed.

The analogy remained forgotten on the back burner until yesterday, when our 7th grader once again became a casualty of drama on social media. It turns out that a group chat had gotten ugly and resulted in a couple of the kids, including our son, being dropped from the group by one of his classmates.

We scrolled through the messages, and although nothing terrible was said, one of his "friends" called him, "annoying," in the message group, complete with an eye-roll emoji which inspired a second snarky comment from one of the kids in the group.

How much blame my son deserves in all this, I don't know. He had been participating in the group chat for months, and somewhere along the line may have unknowingly offended someone. I guess that's where I start to get disturbed, and even scared.

I mean, we've all heard about how bad phones are for kids brains and how it's making them anxious and depressed.

Our son is a great kid, and very sensitive. I should clarify that… in "reality" our son is sensitive and thoughtful, but his online persona is a bit different. Actually, I'd say that all the kids are different online where their interaction has more of a detached and impersonal feel. Their insecurity becomes arrogance and narcissism. Their unfiltered discourse feels defensive, sarcastic, and noticeably darker.

I notice a similar dynamic when they play video games, which have now adopted a significant social component. While playing Fortnite, our son and his friends scream at each other, hurling insults and barking commands, while their musclebound, heavily armed avatars try to kill (and then loot) strangers.

I started thinking about that mirror from Harry Potter again. As our kids gaze into this insidious mirror of social media, what distorted image is reflected back? What contorted reflection do others see of them on the other side?

Apps like Noom have shown that there is a strong psychological component to diseases like Type 2 Diabetes, so obviously we are internalizing this stuff!