We've all had someone toxic in our lives. A friend, boyfriend, girlfriend, or family member who wasn't changing you for the better. Sometimes it's hard to realize it, and sometimes it's hard to distance yourself, but it is so important to get out of any toxic relationships you have.
If you're not sure if someone is toxic or not, consider if they share any traits from the following list.
1. They don't make you feel special--you feel plain or boring around them.
2. When you're with them they act as if they can find someone better to be around--if they're willing to leave you and your plans for someone "better."
3. They don't make you feel comfortable in your own skin--they make comments about your body, your image, your personality, your weight, etc.
4. They assume the worst in everyone--they have a chip on their shoulder, and you're stuck hearing about it all the time.
5. If they're angry it's somehow your fault--you didn't cause their anger, but not being able to change its course is your fault.
6. They don't support you--if you mention something you dream about they look at you like you grew a second head. Or you're struggling with something, but they'd prefer to just talk about themselves.
7. You're not a priority to them--they'd "love" to help you or be around you, but something else came up.
It's important to cut toxic people out of your life. Plain and not so simple. It's hard to look at the relationship you've built with this person and have to detach yourself. But it's so important that you do. Toxic people don't change you for the better; they change you into someone you're not happy with, and who they're never going to be fully content with.
"You were red, and you liked me because I was blue. Then you touched me and suddenly I was a lilac sky. But then you decided purple just wasn't for you." -Colors by Halsey
Cutting people out is hard, no doubt about it. The longer you've known someone the harder it is to cut them out. Sometimes they'll realize they're being cut out of your life, but they wont care; they'll just be angry and bitter about it. "If you were actually a friend to me you would be supportive," or "I'm not going to lose any sleep over you deciding to leave." Sometimes they act as if they don't know why you decided to cut yourself free, as if it was random. "I don't know what really happened, we used to be so close but then they just stopped talking to me."
You need to know that you're better than the way they made you feel. You're not someone's sidekick, or their ugly friend. You're not there to make them feel bigger than they are, and for them to make you feel as if you're shrinking in size. Toxic people are not going to change, ever. To you they're toxic, and to some people they find similarities between each other. They don't change, and they don't make exceptions for anyone else. If they're toxic to you, they're most likely toxic to everyone around them. Not everyone sees it at first, but eventually everyone leaves.
Save yourself the hurt, and the embarrassment, and the lampshade placed over who you are. Glow yourself up, and either gradually distance yourself, or rip yourself off like a Band-Aid. You will always deserve better.
