“Look past your thoughts so that you may drink the pure nectar of this moment” - Rumi.
My response to “How are you?” throughout the past week has been, “I think I forgot how to be busy…?”. I had a very good summer, but it was a laid-back summer-- something I’m definitely not used to. I’m type-A to the extreme, and I thrive on being busy, so while my relaxing summer was fun, I absolutely was dying to get back on campus. I thought I’d pick up right where I left off at the end of last spring’s semester, racing from my classes to work, to a club, to rehearsal, out to a party, and still refreshed and awake to do it all over again day after day, because that is the type of lifestyle I love, but I was surprised to find that it was harder than I expected to jump right back into my old routine.
I’m so happy to be back at college because it means seeing all my friends, taking amazing classes, and doing all the things I love to do, but this past week, while full of fun and excitement, wiped me out. I was a walking ball of stress, I had a billion things to get done at once, I lost my ID and my water bottle in the same day… I was a mess! What happened to me? Am I not the student I once was? Even at moments when I had plenty of time to get all my work done, I was stressed about whatever task was next up in my colorful, doodled-upon planner.
As the week came to an end, I started to think about this stress that was taking all my energy and focus and tried to put things into perspective. It’s a big shift to go from home back to college, and it’s okay if that shift takes a little more time than you may expect. And I’m starting to realize that everyone’s a bit crazed at the moment, and I’m by no means the only one that’s feeling overwhelmed by a new year of school. Feeling stressed is part of learning how to deal with stress in a better way, so sometimes you just gotta be in it to learn how to get out of it! That’s how life works!
Though it’s tough to have so many things on my plate, I need to remind myself that I’m this busy because I’m truly passionate about everything I do. I wouldn’t do it if I wasn’t. I’m ambitious, and sometimes that makes me a little crazy, but I bring it upon myself because all the activities I’m involved in, all the classes I’m taking, and making time for my friends are all things that fulfill me. I need to focus on the way that these things make me feel fulfilled rather than the stress that comes with being back at school and see my loaded schedule as an opportunity rather than a burden.
A wonderful new school year is just beginning, and it’s so full of possibility. Even if it takes a little while to get back into that mindset, I’m trying my best to follow my goal for the year-- enjoy every moment and don’t sweat the small stuff!