A friend of mine recently went to a party and had a discussion with the host's father regarding relationships. The conversation took a wrong turn when the father expressed his old school—I'd like to call it outdated—opinion of women in relationships who hang around men. He essentially stated that if a woman is in a relationship with someone they really care about, they wouldn't have relations with males. However, when she pointed out his sons—who are both in committed relationships—hang out with women when their significant others aren't present, he was unresponsive (double standard much?).
Although this is the old school mentality, in today's generation there are people who believe that men and women can't be labeled "just friends." Remember high school when this boy and that girl were rumored to be hooking up just for walking around campus alone? Even when men and women truly are just friends, it's deemed inappropriate if one of the people is in a relationship (or when both are in committed relationships).
If you have complete trust in your relationship, then your partner's choice to maintain cross-sex friendships shouldn't be an issue. If you are worried one of your partner's friends has open feelings towards your partner then express this concern with your significant other and come to an agreement on how to address the matter so you are both comfortable. A little jealousy is okay, but telling someone who they can and can't spend time with is ultimately a dictatorship.
Studies have proven that cross-sex friendships are often more complicated than same-sex ones. According to this article, "...women generally think that guys and gals can 'just be friends,' while men are secretly hoping there’s a chance their relationships with their female friends can be something more." Thus, the "friend zone" emerged. Needless to say, the friend zone is an unavoidable place for many friendships. The way I see it, if you really care about someone, you'd respect their friendship regardless of the fact that it may never turn into a romantic relationship.
It's hard not to fall for someone who's considered a good friend, and when the feelings aren't mutual, people must make a hard decision: stay friends with this awesome person and hope the feelings vanish or let them go because hanging around someone you have strong feelings for can be complicated. I've witnessed both scenarios and it's understandable why someone would cut off a friend they have feelings for, but I greatly respect those who remain patient and as a result, overcome their crush and stay friends with the person. Sometimes if you can't be in a relationship, then staying friends really is the next best option.
I'm not stating cross-sex friendships never lead to sex and complex situations—in fact, they often do—but people of the opposite sex are certainly capable of remaining just friends without complications surfacing. It's healthy for people of the opposite sex to hang out so quit assuming they are only in it for the sex.
