Dear All Of The People Who Thought Your Redhead Jokes Were Funny Or "Cool,"

How do you like me now?

XOXO,

just ferriss

Excusez-moi.

Kick A Ginger Day has officially been kicked to the side and replaced with a more worthy celebration, Nov. 5--National #LoveYourRedHairDay, thanks to How To Be A Redhead. And also because #LoveWins.

I grew up in a time where redhead jokes being "cool" was in its prime. (Thanks, South Park--some of us laughed with you, some still haven't recovered). Society didn't embrace redheads and the conversation wasn't about rocking it like a redhead and how awesome we are by genetics and human nature. Instead, moms, dads, counselors and therapists were giving pep talks, telling their children how beautiful and special they are while everyone else was busy making "funny" jokes.

I can't say I've always loved my red hair but I've also never hated it--for the longest time I don't even remember thinking anything of it. It was just life and it was a fact and I had red hair and there wasn't anything I could do about it. Changing my hair color wasn't presented as an option so I never thought about that. Like I'm sure most redheads have heard from someone near and dear (for me, it was my sweet mother): "Don't you ever dye your beautiful red hair! It will never be the same." And, oh yes, she would be so so sad. (Sometimes, it takes dying your hair to learn you love your red hair.)

Flashback to middle school.

I'm awkward AF. And it's the days where girls become a little cliquier, a little meaner and discover a new-found comfort in their own skin. Boys start taking an interest in girls, influencing our wardrobe choices and openly and casually making fun of redheads because that's like soooooo cool. Shit was real, y'all. Some people I knew who had red hair started dying it because "guys didn't like red hair." And, apparently, they also preferred it straight instead of curly so cue the days of fried whispies and board-straight hair. (Okay fine, I remember when I discovered a straightener and thought I looked pretty cute with straight hair. #guilty)

The show goes on.

Ginger references and bullying continued through high school, creating tension and negative energy in social settings and influencing people's perspectives. I adjusted and responded like any other awkward teenager trying to "be herself." I remember being comfortable while still experiencing hurt and insecurity (because I'm only human, bro). I remember one more extreme phase I went through where I felt so low, my mind was consumed with why I couldn't have been born with blonde hair like my mom or sister. I couldn't stop wondering what I'd look like as a blonde or brunette and if people would find me more attractive. "Mom, don't you think I'd be pretty with blonde hair?" (Basically because my mom is a beautiful blonde.) What a silly (okay stupid/dumb/ridiculous question), I know she thought to herself.

Deep down I was comfortable with my red hair, despite the social void I tried to fill. Things got interesting when I started growing into myself, which was a whole other world to come to understand and adjust to.

Now flash forward to today. I'm an empowered woman who loves her red hair--and a lot of other people do too. I wouldn't change my red hair for anything in the world.

When people see me now, they seem amazed at how I've grown up--or have grown into myself really. Mmhmm, remember when I wasn't cool because I had red hair and you wanted to be cool so we weren't friends but I'll forgive you--it's just cute to see you try now.

What we are exposed to shapes our thoughts and influences human behavior, and as we know, often negatively--though a joke, the fact that Kick A Ginger Day existed before #LoveYourRedHairDay is what I'm talking about! I think my experiences growing up as a redhead, among other things like growing up in a strong and grounded family, are what have led me to be an open-minded being with a desire to influence positive change and conversation.

The conversation about redheads has completely shifted, from gingers have no souls, we're ugly, yada yada and more nonsense, to empowering us and embracing the characteristics and complexities that make us unique, beautiful and rare. This shift in conversation and perspective is so so important because it's what people are talking about, it's how humans connect with and support one another, it impacts the relationships we build, the conversations we have and the way we see each other and the world.

While part of it may be getting older, it has been this amazing and organic shift in society and, in a world that's influenced by media, the media has helped embrace the positive perspective and conversation around it.

Redheads, may we continue to fuel that conversation with the unique energy we bring into the world! Happy #LoveYourRedHairDay and may you spread love today and every day!