The holiday season is often known as the Season of Giving. It’s associated with red kettles and the sound of bells outside of grocery stores and malls. Many people choose to pick an angel off of a tree and purchase presents for an underprivileged child or family. This time of year, we’re surrounded by ways to give back, but in 2016, I found a way to remind me week in and week out just how important giving back is.
This year, I started a more continuous way of giving. I became a Big for Big Brothers Big Sisters Kansas City. There were six months between applying, becoming a Big and actually being matched with a Little. Even though the process was long, I was extremely excited to meet my Little and start developing that lasting relationship.
Unfortunately, my first match didn’t work out as well as I had hoped. After just three months of being matched, she moved to a different state and I was left to decide if I wanted to try again or not. I knew there was a possibility that I would have to wait a lengthy amount of time again, but I chose to try again. I’d seen matches work so well for others in the past and I was determined to find something similar.
In September, I was matched with my new Little. She was shy the first time I met her, but we went to a park near her home to play for a little bit and she began to open up as we found common interests. We had a great relationship right off the bat and I was sure that I was going to teach her many things.
What I’ve learned in the months since then is, I have just as much to learn from her as she does from me, if not more. Without even realizing that she’s doing it, a nine-year-old is opening my eyes to a different world and new vantage points.
We went to a Kansas City Royals game the third time we spent time together. It was her first game, so the first few innings were spent exploring Kauffman Stadium. When we returned to our seats, I found a man sitting in them and as I asked him to move and we made our way past, he made a few discriminatory, rude comments. My Little didn’t seem to notice so I chose not to acknowledge him. On the ride home, though, she began to bring up bullying, racism and how our President-Elect “doesn’t like her very much.” I realized immediately that what I interpreted as her not noticing, was really just her ignoring the situation, just as I had chosen to do.
This was one of the first moments she really opened my eyes. I realized I had underestimated her and her past experiences. She also helped me learn very early on that kids are observant and while they may not mention anything right away, it will come up later. It was also at this moment I realized constantly giving isn’t always going to be fun or easy.
Since that first teaching moment for me, I’ve learned several other little things about continuously celebrating the season of giving. I learned that even when I’m in a bad mood, it’s important to put on a happy face while I spend time with my Little. While it may seem like a chore for me in those moments, I try to remind myself it’s the highlight of her week.
I’ve also learned that time donated can be just as valuable as monetary donation. In the case of Big Brothers Big Sisters, many times the children need someone reliable in their lives. Many children in the program need a relationship and person they can trust to be there when they say they will. The time spent with a Little will help build that relationship and trust. Those are two things no amount of money can buy.
As you start to look at the things you want to accomplish in 2017, consider turning this Season of Giving into continuous giving. Find a cause that you’re passionate about, look up organizations in your city that support it and see what volunteering opportunities they have. For me, it was Big Brothers Big Sisters. What will it be for you?
