It has taken me 20 years to learn that being confident isn't something that happens when you reach a certain weight.

It has taken me 20 years to realize that being confident isn't something that happens when you start dating the guy you like.

It has taken me 20 years to learn that there isn't anything that is going to magically change my outward appearance and make me a super confident person overnight.

Even if I had the ideal body, even if I got that scholarship, even if I was married, even if I had my dream job, even if my Instagram feed looked flawless, even if my health and fitness routine was on point, I probably would still feel insecure.

And this is why...

As human beings, we do this thing where we pick ourselves apart when we look in the mirror.

(This isn't just a female thing either, I am willing to bet some guys out there do this too!)

Then we log onto any social media platform imaginable and we search and compare our lives to those we follow.

We search for something to make us feel tremendously confident and when it fails, we just suck it up, remind ourselves that society preaches the phrase, "love yourself" with flying colors and march on.

Lately, I am learning that confidence isn't something that comes from a number on a scale.

Confidence isn't something that comes from a certain number of followers.

Confidence comes from trusting that there is a God out there who loves me even when I am my least confident, trusting that even at my lowest, even when I run far, He has and will love me anyway.

Now trust me, this confidence doesn't necessarily mean that I am content with where I am at with my body, or with my career, or with anything else. But this confidence reminds me that someone out there has changed my life and made very beautiful things out of a very messy girl's life.

This confidence reminds me that though I have sat in the shadows of silence and shame and loneliness, I don't have to do that anymore.

So sure, I don't have toned arms or Carrie Underwood's legs.

Sure, I don't have the best hair in town or the Instagram worthy relationship.

Sure, my lanky arms still seem too long, my fluffy hair still is hard to tame in humidity, and sure I still struggle with comparing myself to every other girl I walk past.

But, I'll take knowing that all of this is a work in progress.

I'll take knowing that thank the good Lord, I don't have to sit in hurt and pain and suffering.

I trust in knowing that there is a God out there that can and will work in the brokenness in me and make it something new.

I don't know your walk in life. I don't know if we share the same beliefs. But I do want to share this with you.

Regardless of if you are filled to the brim with confidence or lacking self-esteem like no other, you are loved.

Whether you are running in full force away from anything you have ever believed, running full throttle after Christ, walking through a time of deep depression, feeling like you are drowning in anxiety, feeling like you have things under control on your own, or feeling like your life is a mess, you are loved.

And no, there isn't a number on a scale that will tell you that.

There is not a number of followers that will show you that.

There is no dream job that will tell you that.

But at the end of the day, when all of those things may not be there to tell you that, you can rest in knowing that your identity is not in those things.

You can know that you were made in the image of a God who LOVES you and that is pretty rad my friends.

Maybe you have heard this a thousand times or maybe you are hearing it for the first time right now, but regardless of if we share the same religion, regardless of if we are the same color, age, height, shape, gender, or anything else, you are loved.

There may not be something in this world that will flip the switch on your confidence and make you feel like "a million bucks" but knowing that you are loved is a pretty dang good place to start.

I would encourage you to take a look at those around you and remind them that they too are loved.

I would encourage you to rest in knowing that there is someone out there who loves you far more than you could ever comprehend, grasp, or imagine.