In retrospect, I never imagined I’d be in the position I am in today. I completely dropped my sorority the week of finals my freshman year. That is nearly an entire year and a couple of thousand of dollars spent on this organization. Do I regret it? No. Do I miss it? Sometimes. Am I OK? Yes. Yes, I am OK. To anyone wondering what it’s like once you leave Greek life, listen up.
1. The Members Won't Hate You
When I finally made the choice to resign from my sorority, I was worried the girls wouldn’t want to be my friends anymore. I couldn’t have been more wrong. Our president’s grand-Little drove me to the house to sign my papers and turn in my badge. That says a lot about the women of this organization. Sure it can be a little awkward putting in the Groupme, “hey y’all, I’m dropping please, don’t hate me,” but they understand. They were your sisters at one point in time. I still get texts from members asking when I’ll be in town and what I’m doing to celebrate my birthday. The girls who decide to hate you for leaving aren’t the kind of girls you would want to be your friends, anyway.
2. Your Big Is Still Your Big
My Big is probably one of the most genuine people I met in the sorority. She was the girl who preffed me and the one I ran down Greek Row on Bid Day to. Although your Big will probably take another Little come the next recruitment, you will still be her Little. You created memories with her and took endless numbers of photos you just can’t delete. I still talk to my “family” at least once a week in our group chat. If you are lucky enough to be adopted into such a great group of girls as I, then it’s a much smoother process. Sometimes I forget I met them through the sorority because we can discuss things besides Greek life. We truly care about how each other is doing, how that date went with a boy, and how crazy life is becoming for all of us.
3. Frat Rats Ask the Most Annoying Questions
“Were they mean?” “Who did you piss off?” “Who pissed you off?” “Can I have your shirts?” “How about your game day stickers?” I don’t think the gentlemen of these fraternities realize girls do not concern themselves with such petty things. My shirts are mine because I paid for them. I’m technically supposed to give them back, but I’ll probably donate them my to church. Some girls were mean, not to me, but to other members and it really sucked to watch. I honestly think I frustrated more members than members actually frustrated me. I do not take being told what to do very well. I had a friend in a fraternity tell me, “You’d do better in a frat.” I wish these men would understand that this decision is very personal, and isn’t always based on drama.
4. No Reason Will Ever Justify Why You Dropped
Because I love the girls of my previous sorority, I wont give specific details as to why I left. I will say there were some internal conflicts left unsettled that I do not ever wish to discuss. Nothing awful or anything; just some things said that deeply hurt me. When I left I told the girls it was for financial reasons. That is partly true. My parents told me I could not go on mission trips anymore because the sorority was expensive. I slowly realized I wanted to take those trips and travel more than I wanted to be Greek. I have been going on mission trips since I was 11. I’ve been up to Baltimore, down to Miami, and over to Zimbabwe. I missed those experiences more than I wanted to be Greek. Some girls don’t think that’s a good enough excuse, and that’s OK, because it’s not their life.
5. You Can Still Make Friends
I was always under the impression Greek life was the only way to meet people. The most genuine people I have met in my college experience have been in my classes. My first semester, I met one of my absolute favorite people in an environmental science class. I was feeling wild one day and signed up for student government elections and actually won! You meet people in college by getting out of your comfort zone and growing. That is actually what I did in recruitment, as well. I met some great girls and guys during my time in a sorority. Those genuine friendships will flourish and last a lifetime. Do not think this is the end of your social life. You can still make friends except now it may require a little more effort.
If you’re considering leaving your sorority/fraternity, do not do it not yet. I didn’t wake up one day and make this decision. I urge you to think and pray about the choice you are about to make. At the beginning of my second semester, I started wondering if my time in Greek life was nearing an end. I waited about four months before I made a final decision. I volunteered for everything, was the sober person at most events, signed up for a committee and tried to meet new girls. If you don’t think it is the place for you, I urge you to give it your all for a little more time in order to see what happens. If you are pleased, then stay. And if you are not, then make the decision that you believe is truly best for you.
