They way we met sounds like some cheesy romantic comedy. I never expected anything to happen between us the way it did. We were awkward tweens in tutus and "Harry Potter" shirts. We were Specs and Taz, Blair and Serena. This all really started last summer. I would try and make plans, but you, to me at least, didn't seem interested in doing anything. Maybe it was because it seemed I was more interested in hanging out with my boyfriend, but that never meant I didn't want to spend time with you. We promised to stay in touch during college and call each other once a week, but that never happened. We were both busy, but we should have tried harder to make it work. My life fell apart that semester and I needed you, but I didn't know how to tell you. We still texted, but not like we used to, and I was too afraid to tell you what I was going through. I'm sorry for pushing you away, but it's hard for me to let my closest friends see me so broken up. Back in April I was having a nervous breakdown and I blocked people's numbers in my phone because I needed space to compose myself for a day or two, but then I forgot to unblock you, I never received those texts, and I was too embarrassed to text you to explain why I blocked you. I'm so sorry. I should have texted earlier and now I feel like it's too late, but I do miss you. I miss knowing what's going on in your life, I miss posting random photos of use and staying up too late watching "Angus, Thongs, and Perfect Snogging." I miss our Chevy’s dates and you eating all my fruit snacks. I miss texting each other asking how to respond to something a boy said. I miss our plans for our weddings, and you planning to act out that scene from "Bridesmaids." You can blame me for this, because I pushed you away, but I wish you’d come back. This entire summer I've been debating texting you, but I just don’t know how. I’m sorry I had to explain myself like this and maybe you don’t believe me, but I swear on Harry Styles’ life it’s true. I want to fix things, but maybe you don’t. Maybe you’ll never read this, and you’ll never know what I’m feeling. But to me, throwing away a five-year relationship away like we are, is stupid. I just want to let you know I’m sorry and I miss you.