It's freshman year and I'm in a childhood psychology class. The professors asks us who in the class wants to have children one day.
He said, "If you know you want to have kids, raise your hand." Every hand went up but mine.
He then said, "Ok, if you aren't really sure, or do not want children some day, raise your hand." Once again, my hand was the loner.
After that, comments were made.
Oh my, all I want in life is to have kids!
My dream is to be a stay at home mom.
To those comments, I wanted to vomit.
The thing is, growing up, I was never the one to have Barbie, Ken and their white picket fence with two kids. No, my Barbie rode in the Bat Mobile while shooting at the Joker. From the beginning, I never thought my highest aspirations in life to be becoming a mom- let alone a stay at home mom. I watched my mom work throughout my entire life. She never slowed down or let having a kid stop her from accomplishing her dreams. She did all of that while still making it to every game, recital and spelling bee. For me, separating having a career from being a mom wasn't an option, I watched the women all around me do both.
I mean, come on, it's 2016. Shouldn't we be teaching our young girls that their identity doesn't have to lie in being a mom? I think so. But the thing is, whenever I tell people that I don't really want to have children or that being a stay at home mom is my biggest fear, I get nothing but disapproving sighs and eye rolling. It's like I have been shunned, because I have big plans for my life and career. I don't want my child to have to live in a world where their mom is constantly gone for work. When I tell people this they say, "Well you never know what God has in store for your future." While that is very true, I do not know God's master plan. I also believe he made people like me for a reason. He made the little girls who don't play with baby dolls. He made little girls with big dreams; little girls who are meant to change the world.
Don't get me wrong, being a mom is the hardest job in the world. I know my mom has proclaimed many times that being a mom was much harder than her career. I am in no way demeaning mothers or girls who want to be stay-at-home moms. I am just simply pointing out that God made some girls who are meant to do other things. We should show our young girls that there is nothing wrong with that. It's time to stop shaming the females who aren't conventional, who don't want a fairytale ending and who want to change the world; even if that means not having a family, one day.
