Sometimes, I wish I had realized what I was during high school.

Maybe then strangers, friends and family wouldn't be as confused. Let me make this clear- I'm sure that coming out during middle school or high school is no walk in the park for most people. However, my experience is a little bit different than those who came out years before me, simply because most people knew me as that straight girl my whole life. I understand that it can be confusing, which is why I'm writing this article to shed some light on my situation. Hopefully this will help my friends, acquaintances, and even strangers realize why I had to do this for myself, and why I am a better person for it.

I have to admit now, I was curious about women for most of my life, but I shut those feelings out because I was afraid of what people would say. Due to this, I dated boys all throughout high school... and clearly that didn't work out for me. I thought that was what I wanted, a nice heteronormative relationship, until this summer when I had my first girlfriend. It was an amazing experience (even though it didn't work out) solely because it showed me what I really wanted for myself, and since coming out I've never been happier.

Coming out was a process because I was worried about what my family and friends would think. I knew they would probably be shocked and maybe even embarrassed, but I decided to be brave and tell my close friends. They seemed a little confused, but were extremely supportive. That made me feel a lot better, but I still wasn't ready to tell my parents. I kept thinking...

I kept putting it off until one night I was forced to tell my parents via text message because they kept asking me why I kept hanging out with this random girl (my girlfriend) who they had never met before. They were thinking the worst of the situation! They thought we were out doing drugs or something, but in reality, we were sitting in her apartment and eating pizza. My parents kept hounding me for information, so I knew that I had to tell them. I was terrified. I was shaking and sent the text with clammy hands. My dad replied with, "Okay. Be safe." At that moment, I knew it was going to be okay. My dad was really cool about it, but it took a week or two for my mom to get used to it. She was really confused but wasn't rude or mean to me at all. I am lucky enough to have a supportive immediate family, who welcomed the idea with open arms. Although coming out was a happy ending for me, my story is an anomaly. Not many LGBTQ folks have a positive experience in coming out to their family.

After this, I decided to go public with my announcement. Although I didn't go on Facebook and post "Hey everybody, I'm queer!" I did make some subtle posts on my social media about being queer, and I think people got the message. Since coming out, I've had countless people from my past (whether they are friends or acquaintances) ask me, "What are you now- gay, bisexual or straight?" I've actually had a friend from my freshman year of college ask me, "So are you gay now? It's just confusing because of how you were last year."

Let me answer this for you, and listen well because I'm not repeating it. I identify as queer. I'm not going to label myself as gay or bisexual, because truthfully I still don't know what I like. I like who I like, and that is all. I still think certain men are attractive, and I think that certain women are attractive. I've dated trans people too, so what does that make me?

None of your business.

I'm sure that some people who are reading this are thinking to themselves- This girl isn't actually queer. She's just fed up with men, or it's just a phase. Well, I can assure you, this is not a phase. My current relationship is the happiest one that I've ever been in. My mental health has never been better. My grades have never been better. I am now more invested in LGBTQ issues and politics as a whole. Overall, it was a very positive experience for me. Coming out was honestly the best thing that has ever happened in my life. I finally feel like I'm becoming who I was supposed to be all along.

My experience hasn't been all sunshine and rainbows (get it?) I've had people discriminate against me, whether it's at work or with friends and acquaintances. I've had people say rude things about my boyfriend and I, and constantly question my sexuality. I've learned in the past few months to ignore the rude comments and to educate people that aren't being politically correct. It's frustrating and upsetting, but I know that many people who ask me questions don't know that it's rude. Some people simply ask those questions because they are confused and are looking for more information.

As for the jerks who knowingly make rude comments, I just pay no attention to them because I know that I am better than them. For example, after the election, I had someone from my high school tell me that being gay and gay marriage is disgusting and a sin. I know that I will never get through to them and get them to see my side, so I just ignore those people at all costs.

I'll admit that sometimes I feel like I don't exactly belong in the LGBTQ community because my coming out was so recent. I feel insecure because I haven't gone through some of the things that most of the LGBTQ community has gone through. I know that this is just my insecurity talking, because I know that I am just as much apart of the LGBTQ community as any other lesbian, gay, bisexual, queer, or transgender person. I stand up for LGBTQ rights whenever I can, and I try to raise awareness to all. Even though I haven't been in the community for that long, I am extremely proud of where I've come from and where I've been. I am happier than I've ever been, and I can't wait to see what my future as a queer woman holds.

I am so proud to say that I am queer.

Post Script

To the people who have read this and still don't understand- I'm sorry that you are still confused or you think that what I am doing is wrong. You will probably never understand. Just know that I am not forcing you to be queer, so this isn't affecting you at all. You don't have to like what I'm doing, just be respectful to me and I'll return the favor.

To everyone else- thank you for taking the time to read my story and respecting my lifestyle. If you are my friend or a family member, the best way you can show support for me is to speak up against anti-LGBT slander in our society. I am so grateful for your support.