The Dreaded DTR (Defining The Relationship)

The Dreaded DTR (Defining The Relationship)

More proof that we are driving ourselves from a monogamous society
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So, you're sitting there thinking about that guy or girl that you've been "talking" to (also known as "a way to test out a relationship to see if it would work with a set of ridiculous unspoken rules that are never clear"), and you want to know what's next. You've been having a good time with them, but have no idea where you stand with them. Are you exclusive? Are you "dating?" Are they saying the same nice stuff that they say to you to other people? Is there any future with this person at all, or are they just wasting your time? Once the questions start, they never stop until you do the dreaded DTR.

No one wants to be the first to DTR (define the relationship) because they don't want to seem too clingy, but it eventually needs to happen.

Stereotypically in the past, if a boy starts the DTR conversation, it's negative; usually in a way that either dissolves the "relationship" completely, or cuts off romantic pieces of the relationship and sticks the partner with "let's just be friends".

Now don't get me wrong here, girls can be part of this negative stereotype conversation as well. In fact, girls have been more likely to do this in the past few years with the ever popular sticking them in the "friend-zone" (the inescapable place girls put their old potential partners in hopes of being friends while she eventually finds someone else).

It's important to know that there are only a couple different ways that a DTR conversation can go.

First, and most common, there is the situation where one person likes the other much more than the other. This often results in either the "friend-zone" or a friends with benefits relationship. Sadly, people would much rather be friends with an addition of physical interactions in an unromantic nature than have just a friendship with a person. I personally believe that this is because the person who likes the other party more wants them to be so happy that they will literally put their own happiness on the line and torture themselves for the other person. And guess what? That person torturing themselves will most likely never get credit for what they do for the other person. Also, the person loses respect by the other party once physical actions start as the friendship awkwardly diminishes until all that's left is a booty call. How sad of a world do we live in? The only other solution in this situation is to ghost each other and hold the amazing ability to be able to walk right past each other without showing any sign that you used to have feelings for each other, or even know each other in general. Slay on the outside, hurt on the inside. That's the motto today, right?

Second, and rather rare, is the actual relationship that comes from the conversation. You both decide that you want to pursue the relationship further and become "official".

DTR is one of those "keep your hopes high but expectations low" kind of deal. Good job 21st century for continuing to drive society away from a monogamous culture.

Cover Image Credit: pinimg.com

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8 Reasons Why My Dad Is the Most Important Man In My Life

Forever my number one guy.
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Growing up, there's been one consistent man I can always count on, my father. In any aspect of my life, my dad has always been there, showing me unconditional love and respect every day. No matter what, I know that my dad will always be the most important man in my life for many reasons.

1. He has always been there.

Literally. From the day I was born until today, I have never not been able to count on my dad to be there for me, uplift me and be the best dad he can be.

2. He learned to adapt and suffer through girly trends to make me happy.

I'm sure when my dad was younger and pictured his future, he didn't think about the Barbie pretend pageants, dressing up as a princess, perfecting my pigtails and enduring other countless girly events. My dad never turned me down when I wanted to play a game, no matter what and was always willing to help me pick out cute outfits and do my hair before preschool.

3. He sends the cutest texts.

Random text messages since I have gotten my own cell phone have always come my way from my dad. Those randoms "I love you so much" and "I am so proud of you" never fail to make me smile, and I can always count on my dad for an adorable text message when I'm feeling down.

4. He taught me how to be brave.

When I needed to learn how to swim, he threw me in the pool. When I needed to learn how to ride a bike, he went alongside me and made sure I didn't fall too badly. When I needed to learn how to drive, he was there next to me, making sure I didn't crash.

5. He encourages me to best the best I can be.

My dad sees the best in me, no matter how much I fail. He's always there to support me and turn my failures into successes. He can sit on the phone with me for hours, talking future career stuff and listening to me lay out my future plans and goals. He wants the absolute best for me, and no is never an option, he is always willing to do whatever it takes to get me where I need to be.

6. He gets sentimental way too often, but it's cute.

Whether you're sitting down at the kitchen table, reminiscing about your childhood, or that one song comes on that your dad insists you will dance to together on your wedding day, your dad's emotions often come out in the cutest possible way, forever reminding you how loved you are.


7. He supports you, emotionally and financially.

Need to vent about a guy in your life that isn't treating you well? My dad is there. Need some extra cash to help fund spring break? He's there for that, too.

8. He shows me how I should be treated.

Yes, my dad treats me like a princess, and I don't expect every guy I meet to wait on me hand and foot, but I do expect respect, and that's exactly what my dad showed I deserve. From the way he loves, admires, and respects me, he shows me that there are guys out there who will one day come along and treat me like that. My dad always advises me to not put up with less than I deserve and assures me that the right guy will come along one day.

For these reasons and more, my dad will forever be my No. 1 man. I love you!

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Newsflash! It's Time For Everybody To Love Everybody

Come on, people, get it together.

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I, personally, think it's time for everybody to just start loving each other. Now listen, this doesn't mean you need to actually love everyone, but at least accept them. Acceptance is the closest thing we are gonna get to loving each other.

Let me tell you a little something: politics at the moment are very messy. No matter which side it is, it's messy. There is no denying that. If you try to deny that, then good for you, you're not helping anybody. If you really want some change, you need to start being the bigger person. Change isn't about who can yell about something louder or who has the "better" argument, it's about being respectful.

Just because someone has an opposing view does not mean you need to yell at them. Does yelling solve anything ever? Maybe temporarily, like for 2 minutes, but that's about as long as you're gonna get. There's absolutely no need to indirectly say something about certain individuals on social media. Yes, there is freedom of speech, but everybody should keep in mind why they have that right and why they still have it.

I do not understand why it is so hard to be respectful of one another. If someone goes after another person talking about how absolutely terrible it is of them thinking something should be illegal, the person who's being yelled at should respectfully ignore the other individual's disrespectful remarks. If the individual does not stop, then they are not aware that they are making no difference in the world.

What I'm trying to get at here is that in order to love each other, we really need to accept all our differences. If we really want change we need to go right to the sources, not just yell at each other from across the street. If everyone learned to accept each other, life would be a whole lot easier. Is this ever going to happen? Of course not. This is the solution though, whether you think so or not.

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