For people outside the campus bubble, December is the most wonderful time of the year. Lights on houses are around the neighborhood, spending money isn't as stressful as it usually is, and everyone's waiting for the man dressed in red to shimmy down our fire places to leave presents in exchange for cookies. But, if you're in college, things look a little different. Professors sit back and relax while answering all of their emails with the same line: "read the syllabus", extra credit that's been available since September is the number one priority, and all of the money we were supposed to spend on presents for the fabulous people paying for our education (and failed classes) is spent on dominos two for twenty pizza deals. And the funny part is, no one but your fellow college students really understand it. Parent's say they only want As, teachers think that by all choosing the same due date they will teach you how to manage your time better, and grandparents believe that some fluffy socks and box of muffins in your mail will make it all go away.

So, for anyone interested, here’s how finals week actually works.

1. You spend all your time in the library
2. It feels like you’ve done nothing
3. You’ve actually done nothing
4. Not one single food is appetizing
5. Food comes up instead of going down
6. You’re talking to your professors more within this week than you have all semesters
7. Teachers don’t give extra credit
8. You put teachers on the top of your “spook list” for when you’re a ghost
9. You’re hoping headaches can kill
10. You google if they can
11. You find out they can
12. You get happy
13. You realize you’re not that lucky
14. Anything but sitting in the library seems unproductive
15. You break out an advent calendar to motivate you through the day
16. You buy a bag of m&ms because the advent calendar candies aren’t enough
17. Your room’s a mess
18. You don’t clean it
19. You’d rather trip and break your skull
20. You don’t know what’s messy and what’s dirty
21. You realize you don’t know anything
22. You tell parents you're stressed
23. They joke around
24. You realize your life’s a joke
25. They say you better get As
26. They actually recommend alcohol
27. Alcohol doesn’t help
28. You know you need help
29. You have no help
30. Why? Because professors don’t give extra credit.

Go back to number 7.

And there you have it, the ongoing thoughts of a college student who's trying to enjoy the most wonderful time of the year during a student's worst. I did this in 5 minutes. Five minutes I could’ve been studying. Reason for number 3.