Relationships are hard in college for a sensitive soul. I’m one of many that haven’t had much luck with them. For the almost two years I’ve been at college, I haven’t once been in a relationship. The struggle is definitely real, but I know I’m not alone. So many other girls in college are faced with this and I was hoping my story could shed some light on this college epidemic.

At the beginning of fall, I went on a couple of dates with this guy. Nothing serious, but there was some potential there. He took me on a date to get coffee, which in my book, is the best first date. He was cute and we seemed to get along well. We even went on a second date: we went to a park, got pizza and he even took me to Walmart to get some stuff I needed. I assumed there’d be a third date, and I tried to ask him but he was “too busy.”

Which is something I get a lot. They’re always too busy with something. I don’t believe anyone’s too busy to hang out with someone and I honestly find this to be the worst excuse. If you care about someone, you can make time for them. I understand that we weren’t at the ‘caring about each other’ level, but you’ll never get there if you don’t even hangout. In this situation, he started dated someone else a couple of weeks later. Which I also get a lot. How could I not be personally offended?

For a while I thought there was something wrong with me. That I was too flawed for any promising relationship. I was convinced that I deserved these unlucky attempts at love. It was in the back of my mind every time I started talking to someone new. I would question their actions just as much as I questioned myself. A few let downs started to dictate my success in relationships. But then I realized something. Why would I let these guys who led me on keep controlling me?

We always let failure follow us to our futures when it doesn’t deserve to be there. I shouldn’t be letting guys like him still affect me. None of them saw the value in me; the beauty of my core. Because they were “too busy” to get to know it. They only knew the surface of me. The part of me that embodies all that I am was still undiscovered. The person my friends see wasn’t what he saw. They hurt this deeper part of me when they weren’t even given access to it, and that’s just not right. They picked someone that showed more on their surface, and I shouldn’t take it so personally.

Sometimes you aren’t going to be peoples first choice, but you should move on. Because some day, you will be. He won’t be too busy to get to know everything about you: from your favorite color to your dreams, and it’ll all be worth it. Trust me, it’s worth it.