Over the past two weeks I’ve learned more than I ever could have imagined. I spent five days on a pre-orientation trip with an amazing group of people, another five days participating in freshman orientation, and the past five days muddling through the world of college education. Honestly, it’s pretty overwhelming. From sleeping in my dorm room for the first time, to staying up until all hours finishing math homework, I’ve come to understand that college is both what I expected it to be, but also extremely different. While my experience as a student athlete may differ from some of yours, I’d say much of what we’ve done thus far is similar. Looking back on my first week of classes I can say I’m sleep-deprived, stressed, and somewhat hungry all the time. Unlimited swipes at the caf is a blessing and a curse, and I’m finally realizing how people actually gain the Freshman 15.
Luckily, my roommate’s a catch, and I’ve met some pretty cool friends. Somehow we’re already talking about visiting each other over breaks and rooming together next year. We’ve barely known each other a week. That’s the funny thing about college, you get to know people so quickly you forget that a month ago these people didn’t exist to you. However, as someone with her fair share of trust issues, I get how hard it is to open up sometimes. Not knowing how someone will react or respond to you is nerve wracking, but is something you have to take a chance on. For me, making new friends is amazingly terrifying. You have no idea who these people are or where they come from, yet you choose to let them into a little bit of your world. Compared to high school friends, the lifelong bonds aren’t there yet, but that doesn’t mean they never will be.
Over the past 24 hours I found myself missing my friends and family a little extra. Letting go of such big pieces of my life is heart-wrenching and scary, and sometimes I find myself wishing I could rewind to the beginning of summer when everything seemed simple. Part of growing up is moving on to things that are supposed to be “bigger and better,” and a lot of the time I believe this chapter has so much more to offer than anything else I’ve experienced. But, that doesn’t make the distance between me and the people I love any closer. Right now it’s just about living in the moment and making the best of every opportunity; taking chances and putting myself out there.
As the space between my life here at college and my life at home grows I wonder what it’ll be like to go home. I’d like to think things will be the same, but realistically they probably won’t be. Will my best friends still be my best friends? I hope so, because I’m not exactly sure who I am without them. However, everyone’s moving in different directions. We’re in different places doing different things with different people. How is all that not supposed to change you?
Just remember, change is a good thing. The people most important to you will stay that way if that’s how it’s meant to be, if not, there are other fish in the sea. It’s not the thought everyone wants to face, but to let go you have to move on, too.
