In all sincerity, people do change but not for the reasons you wish they would.
We all crave to believe that our former lovers, loves us and will do anything for us... including change. However, ladies and gentleman, it is not true.
It isn’t true because someone who has had those habits for twenty plus years will not change overnight or within a year. To be honest, unless they are putting you or themselves in danger, they shouldn’t either. Every person has their own story and experiences that one will never understand no matter how long you know him or her.
Time doesn’t determine maturity or character, actions do.
So why, if they have hurt you in the past, do they always tell you they will change? Because they know your worth and want to keep you around. They know how beautiful you are inside and out. They simply didn’t know how to appreciate it and accept such a great thing. The individual knows you will be okay without him or her. When you give them an ultimatum to get better, they will say yes and do it for a month or two but soon enough, the same cycle begins.
People change for themselves. It must come from within.
It must come from the heart and for their own sake. I am sure you wouldn’t change for just anyone and so the same applies to your lover and/or friend. Don’t expect them to if you wouldn’t do it either. I have changed many times and I am sure you have to, but you have done it for your own good. Uncomfortable situations and experiences are the reasons for change. Adversities and triumphs help us grow and improve ourselves on a daily basis.
All I ask is if you are in a situation where the person is harming you or their own self and choose to not change, please leave. Don’t believe them when they say they will. Don’t do it for your own good because then they will bring you down with them. Unless they prove it through actions, on a consistent and honest basis, don’t fall into the same trap.
The right people will come into your life by the type of energy you embrace and the attitude you have towards life.
If you want positive, loving, and successful people in your life, start by practicing those traits. Become the person you hope to marry one day or have a strong friendship with. Only then, the universe will align you with the right individuals.
Don’t fall for empty promises. Be strong and bold enough to walk away and say, “Enough.” You won’t regret it, I promise you.
For all of those amazing individuals currently by your side, cherish them and who they are. If they had a rough past, accept it. They aren’t there anymore, right? Good, you have no reason to be there either or judge them.
Grow with them and continue to look ahead. You can’t change anyone, and no one can change you.
When he or she says they will change for you, please say, “Thank you but I don’t appreciate liars,” and confidently walk away.