“My mother told me I had a chameleon soul, no moral compass pointing due north, no fixed personality; just an inner indecisiveness that was as wide and as wavering as the ocean…”
–Lana Del Ray, Ride
I tapped my finger curiously at the thick, PetSmart glass, unable to find the small, camouflaged, lizard. Right in front of me two eyes shifted, focusing in on the goofy- looking teenager with her hair askew, mouth wide-open in awe of the magic act before her.
Suddenly, Lana del Ray’s raspy voice echoed in my ears as I stared at my tree climbing friend, my mirrored blue eyes reflecting back through the glass, I realized my similarity to the creature before me alongside the truth in how completely OK it is to have a chameleon soul.
Throughout high school, I constantly found myself the center of multiple friend groups simultaneously- each more different than the next. My chameleon soul allowed me to assimilate with nearly every group, blending with and without groups of various ages, genders, and ideas-- introducing me to a new, magical, nomadic lifestyle and some of the most unbelievable experiences of my life.
Unlike the stereotypical high school experience that allows membership to only one specific clique, my temperamental soul gave me the ability to merge into unfamiliar surroundings and helped me fracture the commonplace expectation with a VIP pass to a magnitude of different friendships.
Sure, my “inner indecisiveness” can be problematic… I mean, when given the choice between Chipotle or Panera, my mind races 1,000,000 miles an hour, scavenging for every possible benefit and consequence relative to each option, as I've learned there are always multiple. However, the same inability to decide has truly opened hundreds of doors and given me the opportunity to experience the remarkable diversity of the world through an incredible variety of activities and people all with differing ideas and life-styles.
Far from the cliques flooding the crowded halls of my school, exclusive and secretive, I find myself habitually chatting with people of all grades, regardless of their corresponding friend groups. These random “chats” with “strangers” have introduced me not only to differing mentalities, opinions, and views of the world, but some of my best friends.
Although I can’t blend into the walls of my dark, pink bedroom, see in two completely different directions at once, or lick up a cricket without the slightest hesitation, I can see the world around me with the eyesight of the chameleon, with a wholesome perspective. And even though my I’ve never been fixed on one specific point, my fickle, internal compass has replaced my soul with chameleon eyes and granted me the gift of inconceivable insight and the ability to see the world in ways unknown.
