Living in a country where the beauty standards are impossible to meet is emotionally and physically exhausting. Body shaming in this country is real. It’s harmful to self esteem and confidence. Some women even start turning to extreme forms of dieting like anorexia, bulimia, obsessively exercising, or starting liquid diets to obtain the perfect body. In a world with unreachable beauty standards, it’s difficult to love the way you look.
There are many factors as to why women are so ashamed or hatful of their bodies. From a young age, girls in school are shamed for wearing tank tops, showing some thigh, or having a bra strap showing. I’ve seen stories in the news in which girls are sent home for wearing tank tops, or showing “too much” shoulder or collarbone. It’s seen as a ‘distraction’ to boys. The word distraction makes it seem like girls are an object that boys have for pleasure, and showing too much skin will cause them to be unfocused. The boys will only be able to concentrate on their desire for the girls instead of focusing on learning. Not only does the dress code objectify girls bodies, but it also makes the impression that boys can’t keep it together when they see a little shoulder. Enforcing a strict dress code causes fear that girls are going to get sent home for what they wear, so they start policing their bodies so they don’t have to go home. The dress code is held in high regard while we simultaneously live in a world where we hypersexualize women’s bodies.
Women's bodies are exposed in advertisements, television shows, and movies on a daily basis. In fact, if you turned on the television right now, I bet you’d see a woman in a bikini biting into a burger, or a woman in little to no clothes posing for a perfume ad. We are exposed to image after image what the ‘perfect’ body is. Women are supposed to be sexy, seductive, and flawless. Our society holds these images of skinny, busty women with perfectly smooth skin as the ideal woman. We use negative rhetoric towards bodies that do not look like this, making them hateful of the way they look. We call women fat for sitting and having rolls. We call women sluts when they show skin if they aren't considered skinny. We pick apart women for the smallest things that don't make sense, like the way our eyebrows look. We put girls and women in a spotlight and pick apart their imperfections.
This is how we become ashamed of our bodies. This is why we look in the mirror and think, "I'm so fat", "I wish I had bigger boobs", or "Why do I look like this? I'm so ugly!!". It's hard to embrace your looks when everywhere you turn you're being told to put some clothes on, that you're not sexy enough, or that you have rolls when you sit down.
Loving and appreciating my body has been a difficult journey. This summer I stopped talking down to myself about the way I look. I often tell myself that my body is capable of amazing things, like healing itself and growing a human. I tell myself that I have one body, and I need to love it and take care of it. I fight for the rights of women's bodies, so it seems silly not to love the one I’m in. Of course I have days where I struggle, and I find myself talking down about myself or harshly comparing myself to someone else. On low days, I try to remind myself of the things I love about my body. Then I wake up the next day, and try to have a better day. My self esteem is doing much better, and I carry myself with more confidence. Loving your body despite the harsh beauty standards that we live in IS possible, but it’s hard work. You have to unlearn the negativity that has been drilled into you since a young age. In the end, you just have to remember that you are only given one body, and you have to take care of it and love it. Not one human on this Earth has the same body as you. Cherish your unique body full of quirks and ‘flaws’, and together we can tear down our beauty standards.
