Suddenly, "I care about this" means "I don't care about that". I can no longer advocate for a cause and support another. I can no longer wish and attempt to help certain people without getting backlash for "ignoring" and "forgetting" about others. I can no longer express sorrow and sadness because apparently it's misplaced or overdue.
Syrian refugees are seeking help after being forced to flee their country due to a violent, life-threatening civil war. Children are losing parents and siblings and friends—everything they know to be life. I feel for them. I want to help them.
Veterans in the U.S. struggle after leaving the military; over 50,000 of them sleep on the streets every night with no food in their bellies, nor hope for their futures. I feel for them. I want to help them.
Women continue to fight for equal rights in a world that sees them as inferior to men. They're looked at as weaker, less capable, less deserving. They're told to stay in the kitchen, to graciously accept 77% of "earnings" compared to men's. I am one of them. I feel for them. I want to help them.
African-Americans are widely and cruelly discriminated against. They're sized up within seconds as dangerous or guilty. When in reality, they're the ones in danger of being stereotyped, targeted, and wrongly accused; guilty only of fearing for their lives when they're stopped or pulled over, fearing being viewed as lesser. I feel for them. I want to help them.
Potential mothers come in all forms: overjoyed, disappointed, scared, uncertain. Some didn't plan for a child, at least not right now. Others were trying for months and finally got their miracle. Some risk losing their own lives to give life to another. Others know they can't give a potential child a good life, but can still make something amazing out of their own. I feel for them. I want to help them.
When I support a cause, I'm not not supporting another. I care about all people, all issues, and I'll do all that I can to raise awareness for them and provoke change. So when I show concern for the refugees who just lost their homes, don't say "what about the homeless veterans here in America?" When I promote feminism and demand to be treated equally as a woman, don't tell me men matter too—I know that, it's why I'm a feminist. When I oppose unfair treatment of African-Americans and support the Black Lives Matter movement, don't argue that "all lives matter"; nobody said they didn't, but some certainly showed they think black lives matter less. And when I worry about the wellbeing of a mother who has a life-endangering pregnancy and is considering abortion, don't tell me that I don't care about the baby's life.
There is much to advocate for in this world. Use your energy to advocate for the issues and the people nearest and dearest to your heart, rather than to argue with someone else about what and who they're trying to help. Chances are, you're on the same team.
