My mom knew she’d marry my dad because of jelly beans. No, I am not kidding.

When in a relationship, it appears women and men are always waiting for the other shoe to drop. Although relationships can and should be fun, they still require work to be successful. Here is my question: Why spend all this time trying to make a relationship work if there are warning signs indicating otherwise? As women, we tend to look for red flags that predict early on whether a relationship will sour or sink like the Titanic. A great indicator of a successful relationship is “The Jelly Bean Challenge.”

I have always idolized my parents’ relationship. After 35 years, they still love and care for each other just as much, if not more, than the day they got engaged. They always know how to make the other laugh and appreciate the little things about one another. What stands out the most is the deep respect and understanding they have for each other.

In all honesty, my parents have been together so long that they know what each other is thinking without the other saying anything. Do not play any team game against them, because they will annihilate you. They have taught me what selflessness truly means when it comes to relationships. Throughout my life, I have seen them sacrifice things for one another time and time again. They have been through health, financial, and familial issues, but they also come out stronger in the end.

My parents met when my mom was a senior in high school and my dad was a freshman in college. After learning she would be going to Ohio State for college, my mom asked her cousin if she knew any cute guys. Her cousin did, and that person was my dad.

When my mom and dad met for their first date, my father brought along a package of Jelly Bellies. Since they met the year Jelly Bellies came out and my mom grew up in a very small town, she had never experienced the diverse, interesting flavors. When sharing jelly beans, my dad let my mom pick out and eat all the good flavors she wanted, while he ate all the questionable ones. From that moment, my mom knew my dad was “the one.”

Upon learning this story for the first time many years ago, I dubbed this “The Jelly Bean Challenge.” Will a guy be willing to sacrifice some of his favorite things for you? The test looks for equanimity between partners; not only should they be willing to share, but will they sacrifice things for you as well? I don’t want to come across as a helpless woman who needs a man to sacrifice things for her, because I am more than capable of taking care of myself. However, it is nice to learn that chivalry is not yet dead.

To this day, my dad still passes the “Jelly Bean Challenge”, except instead of jelly beans, it is now letting my mom finish the entire bag of potato chips, eating the best part of the salmon, or the last helping of brussels sprouts. Of course, there is no scientific proof that this challenge is 100% reliable. My mom was recently interviewed for Bustle discussing this challenge as a way to predict the success and future of your relationship.

This challenge is not just for men or relationships - it can be applicable to friendships as well. With anything, you do not want to be the only one invested in making a relationship/friendship work. The “Jelly Bean Challenge” is a great indicator of whether or not your significant other will truly go the distance for you.