I'd just like to give myself a round of applause. I hardly ever give myself the amount of credit I deserve, and now's the time to do so. In all my years of living, I have experienced some truly awful things, but have also had some of the most heartwarming moments. Unfortunately, I tend to let the bad outweigh the good, and zoom in on those times in life more often than I need to. I have to let the great occasions have a little more spotlight from now on.
In college, I made several C's in classes that I thought I should have done better in. High school grades were a breeze for me, and I never saw anything lower than B on my report cards. After I made not one, not two, but three C's in college, I became overly upset with myself. I thought I was not going to make it through the next few years of school. Guess what? I survived, and I got that diploma.
I had a great group of friends while I was in high school. I never thought I would see the day that I would lose some of those friendships. After all that several of us had been through, how could we let our friendship fall apart? As I grew further away from some friends, I saw other friendships blossom into new and wondrous places that I cannot imagine going on in life without now. Even though I miss some memories from the past and friendships that faded, who I have in my life now, I know that they are not going to go anywhere now. I survived losing a few friends, but gained special relationships for years to come.
I applied for almost forty jobs and internships before hearing feedback from a single company. I worked hard in college to get where I am now, so why I was not landing something quick and easily was beyond me. Discouragement lead to sadness, but once I found the internship and job I was suited for, it all started to make sense to me. That's where I was supposed to be. It's not that I wasn't qualified for the other jobs I sent my resume out to: it was because they weren't meant for me. I survived the lonesome months of unemployment, and had the time of my life in my first internship and job.
Lastly, I have been heart broken, but who hasn't? What a horrible, horrendous part of life to get through. It's unimaginably painful losing someone who meant so much to you. Thinking of having to start over and go through all the "firsts" again does not seem ideal. And most importantly, the fear of potentially going through this moment yet again with another person tears at your heartstrings. As I have had great outcomes for the rest of these stories, I don't know what the future holds for the end of this one. But as I said, I have been heart broken: past tense. I am in a great place in life, and so incredibly happy with what I have accomplished so far. The best is yet to come. I survived that heartbreak, and I can again if that's what's to come.
After writing all of this out, I am so proud of myself. What I have been able to work through and continue to have a strong head on my shoulders is an accomplishment I should congratulate myself every day for.
I've been through hard times. I survived it all once, and I can do it again.
