This past Friday I attended a summit called “She Leads.” The purpose of the summit was to empower women and men to lead alongside one another in ministry. Often times women do not feel welcome in the pulpit, and other times they are simply not welcome or wanted in that space. The day was full of addressing the problems that women face and talking about how local and national leaders in ministry deal with this sort of problem. I was excited about this day because this is the very heartbeat of what my future will probably look like. I am a woman who feels called to be in ministry in some capacity, so this was a conversation that I felt was necessary to have.

I am fortunate that I have grown up in a church and have attended a school that welcomes all people with open arms to fulfill their God-given-purpose whether that’s preaching a sermon or being a faithful church attendee. I had never really felt like I needed to be “empowered” because of my gender to simply follow God’s will for my life. That is, until I attended this conference. Don’t get me wrong the conference was good. The speakers had good things to say, but it was when I left the conference that the issues spoken about came to life for me.

There were multiple people who turned the day I had spent into a joke about women being ill-equipped to fill a leadership role. Yes, the things that were said in light of the conference were a joke, but is that not where the whole problem starts? I went to the conference to feel supported by other people – both men and women – who agree that this is a much-needed conversation, and I most certainly did. And somehow, by the end of the day, I felt less qualified than when I walked in. I’m not here to throw anyone under the bus, but I think that it is the time that we address these kinds of issues head on. Hear me when I say, we can't control the fact that our words affect people, but we can control whether they leave a good or bad mark. The words you speak hold great meaning to those that receive them. Always be mindful of this.

The fact of the matter is, I should not have to attend a conference to fully understand that I am good enough to follow the will of God in my life. But this is the world that we live in, a world that sometimes looks to the man to lead rather than the woman standing right beside him. As brothers and sisters in Christ, are we called to build each other up becoming the best that we can be, or to find some way to be superior to another? I do not want to say that women are better at leading than men or vice-versa, but I am asking for the chance to be just as good. I am asking for the chance to freely pursue the calling that I believe God has instilled in me. I am asking that we do not tear each other down with demeaning jokes or comments, but that we do everything in our power to stand beside our fellow believers, cheering them on along the way.