When your parents re-marry, you're always worried about the evil step-parent. You picture this new woman as the Wicked Witch of the West, or this new man as an intruder in your home. Fortunately, for most families, this isn't the case.
Everything takes some getting used to. Having a step-parent is no exception.
My dad remarried when I was young, and I gained myself a step-mother. I honestly wasn't ready for this, but even at a young age I knew I had to accept it anyway. In addition to a new mom, I also had a new sibling. I was always the only child, and honestly sharing the spotlight wasn't something I was used to. I had no idea what was going to happen with this new woman in my life. I didn't know if she was going to be this awful woman who would hate me or whatever. But I gave her a chance. Everyone deserves one.
It was then that I learned how to love someone who isn't my direct relative.
When I decided I was going to call my new mom "Mom," I didn't feel as though I was betraying my birth mother or anything. I mean, she's still my mom. Nothing can really change that. However, some people have told me that, because she didn't birth me, calling her mom was disrespectful to my birth mother... Well, you're wrong.
My step-mother is my second mother.
She became a part of my family. A part of my father, and a part of my heart. She was no Wicked Witch of the West, in fact she was the exact opposite. She turned out to be kind-hearted, accepting, fun, and loving, just like my own mom. She listens to me, cares about me, and is willing to do anything to make sure her kids are happy. Out of me, my little brothers, and my sister, I am the only one who didn't come directly from her. But that doesn't matter to her. It never did.
Not only that, but her and my mother are very close friends. Just because a new man or woman comes into one of your parents lives, doesn't mean that it should be a competition between the new and the old. Your mother will always be your mother, and your father will always be your father. A new husband or wife will never change that.
That's why I call my step-mother "Mom", and refer to my step-sister as my real sister. Because what even is a step-whatever? It's a title, and titles are overrated.
An important thing to remember is that someone doesn't have to birth you just to be your mother. Just like a man doesn't have to be a part of your creation to be your father. People can take on these roles and love and care for you as if you were their own. Really that should be all that matters because honestly, they really don't have to do that. So cut them some slack, because they're just as nervous to meet you as you are to meet them.
