If you're anything like me, the idea of taking a chance on the unknown is terrifying. Most of us don't like the possibility of facing danger, harm, or loss.
Spoiler alert! It's because we're human.
We enjoy the luxury of security. Playing it safe can be a good thing, but what about when it isn't? As we enter new stages in our lives, we come to many crossroads. One road is smooth, and the end is clear. The other might be foggy and seem dangerous. And we can't lie to ourselves — it very well may be. Losing control of our lives is a frightening thought. But the possibility of something worth having at the end of the path gives us the very motivation we need to take those first steps.
A lot of us enter college with a pretty good idea of what we want to do with our lives. Maybe we don't know exactly, but we know the major to choose or the clubs to get involved in. At least, we think we do. There is undeniably too much pressure from society (and honestly, our families) to pick a future and stick to it. Colleges basically advertise, "Come study with us for free! No charge at all! We'll even pay for your housing and groceries and Netflix subscription! BY THE WAY, you have to know exactly what you're doing at the age of 18, stick to it, and graduate in four years if not sooner." This is pretty much an invitation to sign your life away along with any dreams you may find sooner or later. It's also something that we shouldn't buy into.
Like many, I found myself terrified and stuck in the wrong major my freshman year of college. I thought I'd signed my life away in exchange for a scholarship that I'd worked the past four years earning. But instead of accepting this safe route, I made a point to fight for what I wanted and talk to counselors and advisers until I made a deal. I was lucky enough to make the switch and still be able to graduate in four years, but this isn't always the case. And that's OK. Most people I know aren't going to graduate in four years, but they'll be doing things and chasing dreams they love. Finding what you were really meant to do is always going to involve taking risks and making sacrifices. Sadly, those sacrifices can include spending more time and money, but that is so much better than compromising who you are for a degree and a career you don't care about.
Undoubtedly, risks tie into embarrassment. I can't count the number of times I have taken a risk in telling someone what was on my mind, only to be embarrassed. It isn't easy telling your adviser or your parents that you made a mistake and want to take your life in a different direction. I think people who do take these risks should get more credit.
It's not like this is limited to chasing your dreams, either. So many young people in this day and age with technology and social media are so afraid of rejection and embarrassing themselves that they shy away and accept defeat before even taking a chance. I believe always saying the serious, intimate, and real things on our mind to the people who need to hear them is one of the most important things we can do for ourselves.
I'm not promoting the illusion that it's easy to tell someone you've been best friends with for a long time that you have feelings for them, or that they've treated you poorly and it isn't OK. To put yourself out there like that is one of the scariest things in the world. Personally, however, I am more afraid of never saying what I wanted to say than any difficult outcome. I've been rejected and humiliated many times, but in the end, every single time was worth it. And after all, embarrassment lasts only a moment, but the empowerment from taking control of the situation can last for days and ultimately change the way you see yourself.
In my experience, it's impossible to stay upset about being rejected if you also feel invincible.
So what is the point in going through the motions if you know there is something more out there for you? If there is something missing in your life, find it. You have the power to take risks and make mistakes until you find what you're looking for. Humans aren't perfect creatures, and we are bound to fail sometimes. Risks can be burdens on who we are, but they are burdens that allow us to grow.
