This day in age, our society gets upset at anything not seen as politically correct. The problem is that people will get upset at just about anything and everything that they can seem to fuss over. So how are we supposed to teach the future generation what is correct and what isn’t, when even to adults things just seem confusing and ridiculous.

What I’m about to provide is a set of rules that I have actually heard of, seen, or researched that have been advocated in hopes of making everyone feel that the circumstances are fair.

1. Participation trophies need to be given to everyone

It’s bad enough that after middle school, most sports teams will allow you to play for them just as long as they pay the pay-to-play-fee. So, even if you bench the entire season you will be awarded an award for simply participating…participating, as in keeping the bench warm. As in watching the entire season and having no physical contribution to the score of any of the games.

2. Santa is no longer going to say “Ho, Ho, Ho”

The most notable and common phrase that Santa has been saying for centuries is now seen as a derogatory term because it is too similar to the term used for prostitutes. Aside from that, it can frighten children. So what’s the solution? “Ha, Ha, Ha,” will now be stated as a replacement. Because that is just so much better isn’t it?

3. Students are not allowed to be patriotic

A high school student in California was sent home for wearing a t-shirt with the American flag on it. Sounds ridiculous enough right? Mind you it was only the American Flag that was on it. The problem was that the day he wore it just so happened to be May 5th: Cinco de Mayo. His shirt was deemed offensive to those that are not American.

4. It’s unfair to eat peanut butter when someone is allergic to such

We all went to school with the oddball kid that had the peanut allergy. And if a student brought peanut butter they were asked to stay a distance away from that student. A Virginia elementary school had peanut butter cookies as well as chocolate chip cookies that were safely separated. However, after the student’s mother complained that it was unfair because their student was being singled out and had to make the obvious choice, their child was going to be teased and mocked because of their choice. As if having your mom get upset about this situation isn’t embarrassing enough.

5. Elementary schools are no longer allowed to play childhood games

Playing with a jump robe and playing tag are now deemed as dangerous. It is banned from schools because it is unfair to the children who are physically not able to jump rope. They’re not allowed to play tag because a child can fall and get hurt.

Whatever happened to scrape knees, getting hurt, and going through these norms of childhood? Well, they’re now diminished. But don’t worry when kids go on to play organized sports they won’t get hurt because they’ll be on the bench. But it’s okay, they’ll still be rewarded a trophy for their “participation?”

6. In San Francisco, everyone deserves to use public libraries computer screens with privacy screens

After many complaints from a group of adults who advocated that all computers should have privacy screens, it was discovered that many adults would use the computers and publically watch pornography where there were children and families around. But it's okay as long as the privacy screen is in place there is nothing wrong with that.

7. A manhole is no longer appropriate

In many cities, it is common to see manholes that can lead to sewers and other underground areas. But referring to this hole is no longer acceptable as it sounds much too sexual. Instead, to make everyone happy it must be referred to as a utility hole or a maintenance hole.

8. Football is too violent

A Boston sports commentator is suggesting and protesting that those under 14 years of age should not be allowed to play football, as they could get hurt. So by the time they are 15, the age of a freshman or sophomore in high school, they will not have had any experience and have lost out in the years prior to playing the sport.

Well now, here’s an idea. If you don’t want your precious little Timmy to play why don’t you just focus on your own child not playing rather than all kids? Oh, I understand, it could be offensive for only your son to not have that opportunity, so all boys shouldn’t have that opportunity.

9. Dennis the Menace is now too mean of a character

Parents are no longer allowing their children to read of the famous newspaper comics because Dennis could be influencing their children to perform bad behaviors. The look of Dennis has also changed, as he no longer looks like a troubled child.

10. The term “brainstorming” is no longer allowed

Rather, it is politically correct to use the term “thought showers” because this way you won’t offend those who have epilepsy…

11. “Hardworking” and “reliable” are starting to disappear from job ads

These terms are seen as too offensive towards those who do not hold these characteristics, so employers are no longer to ask for these types of employees.

12. Superheroes are deemed too violent

We all know that dress codes do not allow violent and suggestive material on their clothing. But one school in Wisconsin sent a child home because her lunch box had Wonder Woman on it. Mind you it was just a posed picture of Wonder Woman standing and holding her arms up with that had shields on them. This is deemed as violent and the student was asked to no longer bring that lunchbox to school.


Pretty ridiculous, isn’t it? Forget about what your parents told you about the golden rule. Do onto others as you would like them to do onto you, should now be changed to do to others as they kindly ask you to in hopes of keeping them satisfied and not complaining to human resources or suing you. By the way, if any of you are offended after reading this, I think it’s a personal problem.