As I come to the last month or so of my college years, I feel the need to pass on wisdom. Not that I've really mastered college or anything, but I got through it at least. If you want to do the same, you're going to need discipline. Now, having discipline is actually harder for most people than it sounds. If you aren't willing to put up with things you don't want to do, you're never going to go anywhere. Want to lose weight? Just eat less. Want to do better in class? Just talk to professors and study. It's tempting to blame other people or circumstances for how you ended up, but that's not going to help. Likewise, it's tempting to just give up on something when it's not exactly what you envisioned. Go ahead, but good luck ever finding what you're looking for.
Alright, here's my actual advice: Be like water. Maybe that sounds a little too much like a fortune cookie for you but hang with me for a little bit. First, water flows. It doesn't get hung up on everything. That's the first element of getting through college (and life really). Not everything has to matter to you. It is exhausting to care about every issue and person you come across. Now, at the end of college, I have a handful of close friends, a carload of possessions, and that's all. Everything else comes and goes, and that's fine with me. I also like to apply this advice to things people say. I've reached a state where ninety-percent of words just roll off me. I rarely get mad because most things just don't matter that much. It's okay to disagree with someone and not say anything, or disagree and not argue about it. Especially when someone insults you, it is so empowering to just let it roll off you. That person is entitled to an opinion, but it doesn't have to factor into your life at all.
Okay, but what about the things I do really care about? Well, like Bruce Lee says,
"Water can flow, or it can crash."
So, yeah, go ahead and crash. Really put your weight into things. If you think something really matters to you now and will continue to matter later, go after that! When you devote your time to a few things, it's amazing how much easier it is to do them well. I decided I cared about learning more through reading, so about half of the boxes I use to pack are filled with books of all kinds. When I walk to class, I listen to audiobooks instead of music. I read when I have time between classes. I've finished over a dozen books in three months on top of readings for classes, and that makes me happy because I committed to something I know I love.
The third part of the water metaphor is the flow. Water always flows towards something, and so should you. It doesn't really matter where, or even that you know where you're going, but you've got to be going. Do things to better yourself and prepare for a life outside the shelter of college. Set goals, even if they're small, and do them. When I felt comfortable with my school workload, I became president of a club. When I felt comfortable with that, I got a job. When I felt comfortable with that, I started writing for the Odessey to force myself to keep writing something. To be honest, I don't really know where I'm going to end up, but I'm working hard so that I have options and ways to pursue whatever I decide on.
The last thing to think about is the energy of water. College is often referred to as the best years of your life. That doesn't have to be true (my college experience was awful for a variety of reasons), but there is still something to that saying. College is the last time in your life where you'll be surrounded by so many people so similar to you. There are so many potential friends walking around. So, even if I didn't have a good time in college, I still have good memories. My point is, don't let your dedication take over your life so completely that you never stop to enjoy it. A stream flows slower in some parts than others, and so can you. It's fine to meander for a while.
