Bro, Brother, Brah, Broseph, Broski- you name it, that's me. The bro. Translation: one of the guys. Don't get confused, yes, I am a girl, just a different breed. Maybe I'm considered a bro because I prefer beer over pink lemonade vodka, perhaps it's because I am low maintenance, or maybe it's because I watch Sportscenter for fun. Whatever it is, I have yet to figure it out. All I know is this is one of the most frustrating, yet incredible, complexes of my young life. Don't get me wrong, I am truly honored to hold the title of bro, but the glory does come with a few minor drawbacks. It's both a compliment and a curse, and if you can relate, you know these few things make being a bro the best (and worst) of both worlds.
1. Pro.
“You’re such a bro!" A.k.a., You are cool, you can hang.
Con.
Translation: “I would never date you!"
Noted. The feeling is mutual.
2. Pro.
You can eat Chipotle in front of them without any fear of what you look like slaying some guac.
Con.
You actually have to pay for your own Chipotle because by no means is this a date.
Same.
3. Pro.
You don’t have to impress them with your appearance.
Con.
The times you do try with your appearance, they ask you who you are trying to impress or who you are going on a date with.
Not you, bro.
4. Pro.
They trust you with the aux cord.
Con.
The second your latest T-Swift guilty pleasure comes on shuffle, you’ve lost all credibility.
My bad, fam.
5. Pro.
You and the guys can talk about anything...no topic is off limits.
Con.
Literally nothing is off-limits.
OK, maybe some things.
6. Pro.
You are not one of those girls at parties. You know, crying in the bathroom, stumbling around in heels, going up to every girl saying, "OMG, you're like so pretty."
Con (not really).
You are that girl, the one who drops it the lowest, drinks all of the beer and knows every line to Fetty Wap's latest banger.
It's true, I'm not.
7. Pro.
The guys adore you for your ability to hang.
Con.
Their girlfriends, literally, want you on another planet, but the guys wouldn't want you anywhere else, so you're just there.
J. chillen.
8. Pro.
You make yourself at home in their home.
Con.
Their house is literally disgusting.
You try not to breathe or touch anything.
9. Pro.
You have full authority to insult them.
Con.
They have full authority to insult you right back.
Shots fired.
10. Pro.
You don’t have to worry about any dating drama with them because you never have been, and never will be, romantically involved.
Con.
It's possible that you will be alone forever.
Truth hurts.
11. Pro.
Because you're part of the elite status of being a bro, you have little competition.
Con.
The second there is any potential threat to the title, you become territorial over your guy friends, and things could get ugly.
12. Pro.
You know deep down, you all really do care about each other.Con.
You will never come close to actually expressing that sentiment.
Tough love is the best love.
