The fire in your eyes that burned my skin
Had I kept to myself
The scars on my body may not have shown
I was ashamed for my heart that had absorbed your colorless words
Picking apart my body when it had not yet been fixed
Relapse called my name
The drugs I consumed came from the place you called home
I overdosed again and again
Until the pain I felt was numb
And then once more
The certainty of death had not sunken in
In the moment I took that blade to my wrists
Comfort flooded from my veins but regret filtered in
And emptiness became me
The unpredictable became the predictable
But you were sleeping so soundlessly
While I was dying
The water in my eyes could not put yours out
So I left to breathe air not smoke
And now I live