The fire in your eyes that burned my skin

Had I kept to myself

The scars on my body may not have shown

I was ashamed for my heart that had absorbed your colorless words

Picking apart my body when it had not yet been fixed

Relapse called my name

The drugs I consumed came from the place you called home

I overdosed again and again

Until the pain I felt was numb

And then once more

The certainty of death had not sunken in

In the moment I took that blade to my wrists

Comfort flooded from my veins but regret filtered in

And emptiness became me

The unpredictable became the predictable

But you were sleeping so soundlessly

While I was dying

The water in my eyes could not put yours out

So I left to breathe air not smoke

And now I live