“Who here considers his or herself a feminist?” This was the question presented by one of my professors last year and I was both proud and horrified to see that I was the only one in my class of about twenty 18-21-year-old students, with her hand raised. I didn’t know what feminism was as a child, but I was always acutely aware of unjust situations. Whether it be about gender or race, I had no issue pointing out when people were wrong. I still don’t.
Activist author, bell hooks, is well-known throughout the feminist community and defines feminism as “a movement to end sexism, sexist exploitation, and oppression.” The differences in what’s expected of men and women start from as early as conception. People associate colors, toys, clothes, interests, and personality traits with certain genders, when gender itself is a social construction, meaning it is made up by society to tell you how you should behave.
There is no law saying girls can’t wear blue or boys can’t wear pink. However, our society polices and criticizes those who deviate from the social constructions that have been established for years. For example, calling someone ambitious has a completely different meaning for men and women. It’s the difference of being called “a boss” versus being called “bossy” because one has a positive connotation and one has a negative.
In my Women’s Studies class, we discussed how studies have found that girls will stop raising their hands in class because the teacher constantly calls on the boys and this makes girls think what they have to say isn’t important. These differences are implanted in children and they internalize and apply them as they get older.
This exact scenario can apply in a corporate meeting, when a woman may not even bother making a suggestion to her boss because it didn’t come from a man. There is also “mansplaining”, which is when a man talks over a woman who is currently speaking and disregards what she is saying because what he has to say is more important. Either way, the woman’s opinion is deemed irrelevant.
The definition is simple, yet for some, it is complex because many people deny the existence of sexism and oppression. What’s scarier is that some are even more than okay with it. They don’t care that it goes beyond sexism and also addresses race, class, sexuality, gender identity, etc. because the system already benefits them.
Acknowledging these factors in addition to gender inequality is called intersectional feminism. Prior to my college career, I was unaware of what exactly intersectional feminism meant and, therefore, required more education because, excluding sexism, what would I (a white, heterosexual, cisgender, middle class, Christian) possibly know about discrimination or prejudice?
Anyone who claims they are a feminist, but disregards everything except gender inequality is missing the point of feminism and what is sometimes referred to as “white feminism.” This is not real feminism, but since many people have not had to personally deal with issues of race, class, sexuality, and gender identity, they do not talk about them because addressing that these issues exist to people unlike them would acknowledge that they have privileges.
This is where many people have issues with the feminist movement because they take “having privilege” as an insult. They hate the idea that they are helped by the society we live in and how well they do in life is based on the notion that their success comes from pure luck—being born into a family that society happens to favor.
When they hear, “check your privilege” they tend to hear, “You’re not successful because you work hard. Everything is handed to you because you’re white/male.” That is not, and never has been, what “check your privilege means.” If a person is insulted by the idea of checking his or her privilege, then he or she most likely knows nothing of the subject, or they are scared and threatened by change.
I am not arguing that men do not have problems nor that feminism makes them lesser than women because that’s not what feminism is. In fact, bell hooks mentions in her book, Feminism is for Everybody: Passionate Politics, that men are also victims of the patriarchy (male dominated society) as well because society measures a man by his masculinity.
It is constantly reinforced in the media and even by their friends and family, which results in a lot of men having difficulty admitting they were raped or harassed, or that they have depression or mental illness because there’s a societal assumption that these things don’t happen to “real men.” However, even though forcing masculinity on men is toxic, that does not mean they are not favored by society.
Although men are subjected to these inequalities, people of color are often subjected to even higher inequalities. It is well known that a woman makes $.78 to a white man’s $1, but that number gets even lower for people of color for both genders. This gap is even more significant if you’re a woman of color as they are already considered “lesser” by society based off both on their gender and their race.
That’s just assuming you’re not homosexual, transgender, old, poor, disabled, or non-Christian. The outright disregard for these issues are why feminists fight so passionately for change and change comes from stepping outside your own issues and educating yourself on others.
I understand why people have difficulty checking their privilege. It’s difficult to identify or support something you don’t fully understand. However, that does not make the issues people are dealing with any less real. Sexism, racism, homophobia, transphobia, and classism not only exist—they plague our society by dehumanizing people and stripping them of the notion that they matter in our society. I will never hide the fact that I am a feminist because feminism fights against all these vile discriminations and prejudices.
Personally, I’m not sure I can truly look at one particular moment in my life and say, “That’s what made me a feminist.” Perhaps it was an instance in elementary school when a boy who had a crush on me teased me and bothered me and I didn’t understand why I was supposed be flattered by his attention, when all it did was annoy me.
It might’ve been when I was fifteen and was catcalled as I was crossing the street by a middle aged man from his truck and was so appalled that I became nauseous. Or maybe it was when I was sexually harassed by someone on my own campus—putting me through the single most dehumanizing and violating experience of my life.
But being a feminist is honestly something I’ve always known I was. I just didn’t know there was a name for it until later in my life. And if someone were to ask me who it actually benefits, I’d tell that person, “It’s for everyone.” So for anyone who says they aren’t a feminist, you’ll have to forgive the extremely confused look I give you because I simply don’t understand how you are not on your own team.
