My heart is broken. Brangelina was my power couple, my relationship goals, my guide to finding that special someone who is willing to be my partner in crime, my ride or die, the person who is willing to take a bullet for me and I for them. "Mr. and Ms. Smith" may have just been a movie to some people, but to me their relationship introduced me to a thing I strangely like to call, love. Now, what is my definition of "love" you might ask? To tell you the honest truth, I have never experienced that type of feeling before because I have never been in a relationship of any kind that made me express the feelings of love, compassion and companionship to another male human being. When I heard that Angelina Jolie filed for divorce from Brad Pitt on Sept. 16, 2016, and news broke out that the couple is actually separating after being together for 12 years, my whole perception of love being forever turned into love only being temporary. Two days ago, after hearing the heartbreaking news that Brangelina is getting a divorce, my roommate and I got into a serious yet playful discussion about their divorce, the rumors that Brad was having an affair with his "Allied" co-star, Marion Cotillard, Brad's strict parenting that Angelina couldn't seem to fathom, their 6 beautiful kids and the whole idea of being in a relationship and what it means to be in "love" as a whole. My roommate believes that being in "love" is a beautiful thing, while I believe that being in "love" is a waste of good ol' time, money and unnecessary feelings. From Beyonce's "Lemonade" album about Jay-Z's alleged cheating and the Beyhive on the hunt to scalp "Becky with the good hair," to Brangelina getting a divorce, the idea of being in "love" and dealing with relationships is slowly but surely deteriorating in my head.
I understand that I shouldn't ground the idea of what "love" should be like based on these high profile relationships, but not having any experience with relationships or being in "love" in general made me shift to the idea that "love" is like the "Saw" series that we play but only with our hearts. It's just a temporary feeling that we get when we see someone that we have physical and emotional attraction to for a certain period of time, and then we fall out of what we perceive to be "love" and we continue the same cycle with different people over and over again. Love is a very complex thing that I have no time to reason with. Sometimes we can fake "love" and other times we pretend to be in "love" just to keep another person happy. Now, don't get me wrong, just because I believe that "love" is a waste of time doesn't mean that I have fully given up on the idea of being in "love." I'm just now more aware that searching for "love" and the thought of being in "love" is something I shouldn't really be stressing over. I now want to separate myself from the feelings of hurt, heartache, insecurity, the feelings of being cheating on, isolation, one-sided love and everything that "love" has to offer. With the divorce rate being up to 50 percent, according to the American Psychological Association, I honestly believe that "love" is nothing but a sick, twisted game that cupid is having a field day with. In this generation and with the help of social media, people are too afraid of showing true emotions to someone they care for based on this new found disease called catching feelings, and now we're all just loose chickens without heads trying to figure out what "love" is and how we think "love" should be.Do I believe that there is "love" out there for everyone? Sure, I guess.
Would I ever try to give "love" a try? Not at the moment.
What are the things that I "love?" My cat, Tiger, and binge watching "Orange is the New Black," "Law & Order: Special Victims Unit" and "Scandal."
Even though I may think being in "love" is a waste of time and energy, and I can go into great detail of my new found outlook on the idea of being in "love," that would take so much time out of your day from reading this article. What I do like seeing is other people being in "love" for so many years and those old couples you see from time to time that tell you stories on how they first met and the way they made each other feel the first time they laid eyes on each other. My only hope on what I believe what "love" should be are the Obamas.
