Thanksgiving is rapidly approaching, giving us college students less time to prepare than our Monday morning exams we have forgotten all about... the personal questions are coming and there's no way to avoid them. Here is what Aunt Phyllis wants to hear, versus the thoughts that are running ramped through your mind.
- "Are you ‘seeing’ anyone?"
Expectation: Yes, I met a lovely wholesome man at my Sunday afternoon community service club meeting and things are going swimmingly!
Thoughts: Yep, I do indeed see my roommates, my professors AND my therapist on a regular basis! - "How is are your classes going?"
Expectations: Fantastic! Yet another semester full of straight A's, sunshine and rainbows!
Thoughts: Great! I love staying up 'til two am writing papers every week! I hardly ever experience anxiety! College is a blast! - "When are you graduating again?”
Expectations: I'm graduating right on time, next spring, because every credit and schedule lined up perfectly and I've never had to drop an overwhelming class!
Thoughts: Honestly, Uncle Jim, your guess is as good as mine.... - "What are you’re post-grad plans?"
Expectations: To take up that solid dream job offer from that perfect company, in the greatest city in the world!
Thoughts: *See thoughts to question three, Aunt Pam* - "We miss you so much! Have you thought about moving home after school?"
Expectations: Of course! I'll hurry home as soon as I can because this small town has tons of opportunities for the degree I just spent for wonderful years pursuing!
Thoughts: lol nope - "I haven’t seen you post photos with a member of the opposite gender on Facebook lately! Is there something you’d like to share about your sexuality? Are you confused?”
Expectation: Oh conservative Uncle Lewis, you're so funny! I am, of course, 100% heterosexual and I have never once questioned my desires!
Thoughts: No, I'm pretty secure in that one and regardless of the answer, it’s noneyabeeswax, estranged cousin Sam… thanks for asking! - “Are you sure you need to go back for fourths, sweetie?”
Expectations/Thoughts:
- “How many glasses of wine is that?”
Expectations: Oh, this is only number two dad, but don't worry, it's my last!
Thoughts: Oh, I don’t know, DAD. How many beers is that? - “Did you hear cousin Jack is getting married again?”
Expectations: No way! Well, we can only hope this will be the one to stick around! I wish nothing but the happiest of nuptials!
Thoughts: Third time’s the charm, I guess... - “Where is your significant other this year?”
Expectations: Oh, we decided to spend the holiday with our respective families this year.
Reality: Can we just not do this one again, please? PLEASE?
