Emotion is essential to humanity. It is what drives our will. It is the face of challenge we boldly confront. It provides us with the respite we seek during times of adversity. It is raw, as it exists deep inside our core, surfacing as if the entire body were an open wound. It is a fraction of our whole, yet its presence impacts us perpetually. We are human, thus we feel. So, why should anyone have the authority to restrict it?
As a society, we have a cardinal-rule: boys don’t cry. It echoes throughout our nation and beyond. Fathers and mothers scold their sons with these words. Be it doctors, teachers, preachers or any type of leader, this sentiment is repeated time, after time, after time, hoping it will be imprinted into our minds.
We do not allow boys and men to experience emotion, other than anger. We have spawned and sustained this idea that feeling sad, or crying makes a man less masculine (cue eye roll). It is perfectly acceptable for a man to become enraged and violent, but highly unacceptable for men to shed a tear. Any attempt to express emotions in a healthy or positive way is stifled by labeling it as feminine. It is both preposterous and damaging that we assert this type of thinking, as well as openly encourage boys and men to suppress their feelings in the interest of preserving their masculinity. It is worrisome how fragile it is.
I am a man, and I cry. I am not afraid to be open and honest about what I am feeling. Furthermore, I have no interest in feeding into the silly notion that it makes me less of a man, because it does not. I can recall many times I have cried, and for many reasons.
I cried on my first day of kindergarten, because I was afraid to leave my parents for an entire day. I cried while I was in the bathtub on many occasions, because my skin got pruney. I cried when I got in trouble at school. I cried after my little league team lost a baseball game. I cried when relatives passed away. I cry because of heartbreak. I cry when I am scared or frustrated. I cry when I am sad. I cry after arguments. I cry when I am happy. I cry when I am overwhelmed. I cry just to cry.
I will cry when I get married. I will cry when I have children, and when they reach huge milestones. I will cry when my parents die. I will cry when I struggle. I will cry when I am grateful. I will cry just to cry. I will let all my kids cry, whatever the reason.
Crying is healthy. It is a response to intense emotion, of any kind. It is not shameful for anyone to express their feelings with tears. Sometimes we all need to sob, bawl, weep or blubber our way through, and that is OK. We cannot continue to fuel this notion that crying makes a man weak. It is outdated nonsense that only harms us. For all you guys, gals and nonbinary pals, grab a box of tissues and sniffle away. Let us not divide ourselves, but unite in a stream of tears.
