I’d like to start off by saying I’m a huge bookworm, which brings me to today’s topic. I’d like to discuss the fine line between fictitious content and everyday standards, deriving from variations of one statement:

“My expectations for real life relationships and boys/girls are too high thanks to books.”

Woah. Hold the phone. Are fictional characters really to blame for our high expectations? Or is there another culprit?

I personally think it’s a mix of both. We as readers are conditioning ourselves to believe that these types of fictional characters are out there, somewhere. But I’ve been “out there” a lot in the past year, mainly for school, and in that amount of time I’ve discovered that bookish love interests are far from what the real world has to offer. Sure, most authors spout these swoon-worthy characters, loosely based off of actual people – but that’s just it. These characters aren’t usually written as a mirror image of what authors have known. More than likely, these love interests are what they wish could have been, with a few flaws thrown in to make them more relatable.

In all reality, we’re setting ourselves up. Our expectations soar sky high because we no longer have the ability to differentiate between realistic love lives and unrealistic outcomes. I’ll admit that I’m guilty of doing this, on multiple occasions. I’ve waited around for the mysterious new guy. I’ve waited for the jerk [but not a true jerk] who made me feel invisible. I’ve waited for the knight in shining armor. I’ve waited for them all and I got a whole lot of nothing while I sat on my butt, waiting.

That’s what happened when I let my expectations take over. Then I met someone – and he was a game changer.

I went off to college, leaving my hopeless bookish expectations behind. Fast forward a month or so to the day I met my knight in [jeans & a tee shirt] shining armor. For once, a guy had looked at me instead of my friends. I felt good enough, special even. Now, fast forward to the next quarter of school. The aforementioned guy stopped looking and speaking to me entirely. I figured I had just become one of the hundreds of pretty faces on campus. The last fast forward moment isn’t even worth mentioning; it didn’t work out.

At the end of it all, I was left alone, yet again, to ponder how guys in the real world could be so lame compared to fictitious characters. I mean, seriously, are my standards and expectations THAT unattainable?

The simple answer is no.

I put myself out there this past year and looked like a fool, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. Meeting these ridiculous guys has made me realize that my expectations are where they should be. I will wait for my prince. I will wait for the guy who unexpectedly falls for me. I will rise above and beyond to find someone who cares as deeply for others as I do. At this point in my life, I don’t care that books give me crazy expectations that people frown upon, because they also give me hope.

This topic is a double-edged sword. It has good and bad attributes. If you aren’t finding the right significant other, maybe it isn’t a ‘you’ problem like everyone makes it seem. Maybe it’s a societal problem. People don’t even know how to date, let alone speak to each other anymore. I know some of the guys and gals of our generation could learn something from literary characters – even though it’s kind of sad that we have to resort to acceptable behavior demonstrated by non-existent people. I refuse to believe that my “book boyfriends” are all I’ll ever have because I’m not “realistic” enough for everyone else.

I deserve better. And I will wait for it.