Let’s get this out of the way right now. Yes, I am thankful. You think me, of all people, has the courage to travel to a foreign country, kill our enemies for a country back home that doesn’t deserve it? Never.

So please, don’t let me be misunderstood when I say I’m ashamed to be an American.

Don’t get me wrong, I am grateful for all those who have served in past generations and current. Those that serve in the Army, Marine Corps, Navy, Air Force, and Coast Guard deserve praise and gratitude. Thank you!

But, with July 4th right around the bend, I’m not feeling patriotic. When I see red, white, and blue, I cringe. Writing this article, especially around America’s holy Sabbath, is one of the single most scariest feats I have attempted. It’s scary because I’m frightened of my fellow man. One slanderous term about the great country I live in, and I’m deemed a terrorist. If I go as far as to say that it is our fault for the way we are, I’m an ungrateful, child-killing, America-hating, inbred terrorist, who needs to be “taught a lesson about respect”. Respect is a funny word in this context. It most nearly means bigotry. The same Americans who want respect, never dole it out. The same Americans who treat their brothers like dirt, demand to be given absolute power.

This certainly isn’t the same place our ancestors defended. When they were bleeding out on battlefields, terrorized on foreign ground; they did not realize that by going to war, they were creating a country that feels nothing but privilege. Privilege to abuse our laws, shoot up our night clubs, tyrannize one another, all in the name of being a pure blood.

Why should I feel any love for a country that has stepped on the backs of others to achieve “greatness”? The same Americans who are crying for immigrants to be sent back to their homelands, are the same Americans who begged for their help, pleading for extra hands. The same Americans who empathize with those lost in massacres, are the same Americans who demands access to guns 24/7. The same Americans that advocate for freedom, are the same Americans that call me “ni**er” behind my back.

How can I be proud of a country so volatile, destructive, and contradictory?

Why should I feel any love for a country that doesn’t even honor its veterans. I will be forever grateful for those who fought the good fight. They paved the way for us, hardened their hearts so generations to come could gain; they wouldn’t have to struggle as hard… but at what cost? I have been fortunate enough to be acquainted with a number of veterans. Hearing their stories stir up feelings of pride and joy, but those are the good days. On the bad days, I am disgusted. Distressed. This is when stories of failed comradery, broken families, shattered dreams, and painful nights are displayed. Many of them share tales, showing how mentally and physically damaging any war is. They reiterate the constant battle of reaching out for help and receiving none. How can I possibly feel patriotic when I’ve heard stories such as these?

In the end, no matter how you’re celebrating America’s Independence, keep in mind that things aren't what they seem. Yes, there have been moments of bravery and progress in our country, but America has gone through a number of phases in its lifetime and there are undoubtedly more to come.