It often seems like as soon as someone comes out of the closet, they immediately become the spokesperson and official question-answerer for the people around them. It’s easy to see why this happens, since often, the person coming out is one of the only bisexual people around, and so people feel more comfortable asking these questions. While it’s nice that people are curious, and want to understand the life, it still sucks to become the official Encyclopedia of Bisexuality.
For those of you wondering, being bisexual simply means the someone is attracted to two genders. Usually, this is the traditional male and female, however, someone could be attracted to gender queer, non-binary, intersex and anyone else in the gender spectrum, and still be bisexual, so long as it’s just two genders. Read on to see the seven things bisexual people wished you knew.
1. We exist.
While we are currently the smallest group in the LGBT spectrum, we still make up approximately 0.7 percent of the population. Now, that doesn’t seem like much, but that’s still 2,232,300 American citizens identifying as bisexual.
You probably know at least one person who swings both ways, and if you don’t, you may very well be that person!
2. No, we aren’t just looking for threesomes.
It’s easy to see how one might jump to this conclusion, since it seems like the best of both worlds at once. The thing about that is, we are just as lazy as the rest of you, and one person is usually more than enough to try and take care of. Save your “You know, my boyfriend and I were looking to experiment,” for someone else. *
*Does not apply to ALL bisexual people, as some bisexual people, just like some straight people, some gay people, some pansexual people enjoy threesomes, just don’t assume we all do. It gets really annoying.
3. We aren’t more likely to cheat than anyone else.
Bisexuality and monogamy are not opposing ideals. In fact, up to 25 percent of Americans will commit infidelity at least once in their life, and yes, some of them are bisexual people, but correlation does not mean causation. People cheat for a vast number of reasons, and not one of those reasons includes their sexuality.
4. We aren’t confused.
Being in a relationship with a man is entirely different than being in one with a woman, and not just for the obvious reasons. Even heterosexual people can agree, every relationship is different, and the same holds true in the LGBT dating scene. It’s about finding the right person to fit with you.
5. We don’t magically “become straight” or “become gay.”
I’m engaged to a woman, but I’m still bisexual. It isn’t about who you’re dating, but who you’re attracted to, and even when I take her last name, baseball butts will still drive me nuts. If a bisexual person marries a man, they are still bi. If a bisexual person marries a woman, they’re still bi. Don’t tell us to pick a side, because we can’t. That would defeat the point of being bisexual.
6. Some people have a preference, some don’t.
Oftentimes, I’m asked “but which do you like more?” Honestly, I tend to prefer men, it just happens that I fell head over heels for another woman. Most bisexual people don’t have a preferred gender, and if they do, just think of it as having a “type.” Some people like blondes, some like brunettes… some of us like men more, some like women more, and some really don’t care either way.
7. We aren’t hitting on you.
I feel like this gets said in nearly every article about LGBT issues, but it’s true. Just because I’m attracted to women doesn’t mean I’m going to hit on every woman I see. I may be bi, but I still have standards.
