Move over Nicki Minaj and Cardi B, because we got a new trap goddess on the scene. Representin' my hometown of Boynton Beach, FL is the Queen B herself, fourteen-year-old Danielle Bregoli, a.k.a the "Cash Me Outside Girl."
Of course, that's all in the past and the only thing she's catching outside are some sick bars. "I ain't nothin' like these hoes (no); don't compare me to no one (don't do it)," Bregoli, known by her stage name "Bhad Bhabie," spits on her fire debut track "These Heaux."
Sure, hip-hop legend Dr. Dre may have launched Eminem's career and made him a rap icon, but Dr. Phil (with an actual PhD) gave the world a real superstar. As you can see from this thought-provoking music video, Bhabie's short skirt and padded bra symbolizes her desire to please the fans that made her famous to begin with: pervy middle-aged men.
The same noble demographic that has kept New Balance alive is also promoting fine art. Lord bless their beautiful souls! Appeased, the balding, beer-gutted Gods bestowed upon her a record deal with Atlantic Records.
BB joins the ranks of Lil Uzi Vert, Kodak Black and many other visionaries that have signed with Atlantic to spread their message and inspire generations of scantily clad women for years to come.
The era of young girls dressing up as Elsa and Anna from "Frozen" and singing "Let it Go" is over. Four-year-olds will now be dressing up like Bhabie, a legitimate role model, for Halloween and dropping poetic lines like, "These hoes be d*** riding, think they come up cause they let you f*** (you a hoe)," and "You in trailer hoe, bitch you can't compete." Indeed, no one can compete with the visceral potency of lyricism like this.
Once Bhabie's team starts releasing official BB merch, fuggedaboutit! Bregoli dolls, fully equipped with her iconic catchphrases, "Cash me outside, howbow dah!" and "Yeugh!" will be flying off the shelves. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if she surpasses the far less superior barbie dolls that have been enjoyed by poorly misguided girls for over half a century.
It's disappointing to see parents buy their daughters a doll dressed as a doctor or business professional. Fortunately, the Bhabie doll will change all of that by depicting what adolescent girls should be doing: riding around in a car with a thirty-something-year-old man and being dressed for the club.
After all, education is overrated. Why be a lawyer or a human rights activist when you can make trap tunes and talk back to your mother with cancer? I'm glad to see artists like Bad Bhabie setting the bar high and proving that bad behavior really can get you internet fame and a helluva lot of cream to boot. Tupac and Biggie would be proud.
