Since eight grade I have lived alone with my mom. Our relationship is different now that it is just us, with the absence of my father and sister due to divorce causing us to adapt through many difficult situations. On June 17, I turn 21. For me, this comes at a time where I am preparing for the last semester of my college career in the Fall, and balancing learning to drive and figuring out what my post-college picture is going to be. With all these things going on, a birthday is a good reason to step back and reflect. This birthday separates my adolescence and adulthood, and there is a large curve yet to come. Eventually, I might not remember the things I know now, so it is important to write them down. There are different elements in my mom and I's communication that have developed and in no particular order, here are a few of them.
1. Target
Tarjay/Tar-jay happens to be how my mom and I often refer to Target, which happens to be a place we both enjoy exploring. From picking up groceries and normal things, to grabbing new vases for our house only to later see them on HGTV's "Property Brothers" and promptly rewinding several times to look at them again.
2. Thing
While this is one of the most common words for a lot of people, it takes a different form when you spend a lot of time with someone. It is difficult to imagine being able to say "Can you get me the thing off the top of the thing over by the thing?" with anyone else other than my mom. Though normally I'm better at understanding her when she says something like this, rather than her understanding me, it is still amusing nevertheless. Even when one of us gets it wrong, just seeing what we interpreted it as can be funny. Imagine things like: "Oh, you wanted your socks that you left next to your bed? I thought you wanted your glass of water you left on your nightstand" and interrupting mid sentence with "Okay, I'll grab you some Twizzlers" when she was really asking for pretzels. (Except now maybe she wants Twizzlers instead because I mentioned them).
3. Cats
Throughout my life there have always been cats in the house, and currently we have four. Three boys, one girl, and we have nicknames and specific things we do with each. Not many other people will know who Precious is, or Fatty Patty, or Sweet-sweet. But my mom does, and as silly as the names might be, she uses them too. Not to mention I can say "belly" at any point and she knows I mean a cat belly.
While neither of us quite picked up on all the nuances of living in the South, we both do have times that a Southern twang or accent shows up, or her Northern roots rear up. I know never to ask her to say "Pawn shop," and neither of us can really agree on what a bubbler is (we just say water fountain most of the time). Overall though, the ways that my mom and I communicate might not be entirely unique compared to others' experiences, but it is unique and important to me.
I love you, mom.
