A little food for thought...

We, as humans, have no idea what we are capable of. Just one good deed, small act of kindness, or even just a nice conversation can change someone’s life dramatically, and we are almost always oblivious to what we are doing. This was the case with my 9th grade Geometry teacher. Though a year has not even passed since I was in his class, I don’t see how any other could top it. Now, almost every day, even though he’s technically not my teacher anymore, I pop into his room seeking advice, wanting to have good conversation with a good person, or sometimes just to say "hi".

One day, trying to avoid the mixture of heat and humidity that accumulates on the school buses every day before they leave, I went to his (air-conditioned) classroom. With the 2016 candidates starting their race to the presidency, I decided that this would be the year that I took interest in politics. So, I stormed into his room, politely as always, and probably said something along the lines of “tell me about politics please.” Almost immediately, we developed a conversation about Trump, Clinton, and practically every issue facing America at the time. I learned a lot throughout that conversation, but there is one expression I can clearly picture him saying, and I could still recite it verbatim today, “A young republican has no heart; an old democrat has no brain.”

People have told me that, with age, the young, innocent, curious, wide-eyed child disappears from within all of us. When my math teacher said this, though he, to this day, probably has no idea the impact it had on me, I was, for lack of a better term, disappointed. I had grown so accustomed to believing in the good in people and always hoping for the best, and I hated the idea that I might not see that forever. However, throughout the rest of my freshman year in high school, my ways of thinking, believing, even living were changed so dramatically that my sadness began to wear off. I realized that maybe seeing things “realistically” didn’t have to mean seeing the bad in people. Why had it become a crime of stupidity to see the glass half full?

One year at my summer camp, we spent the evening watching a magic show. After performing a few tricks, the magician asked who, by a raise of hands, believed in fate; I raised my hand. Next, he asked who believed in free will; again, I raised my hand. At the time, my mind wasn't really focused on what I was doing, but I soon realized that I had expressed my support for two opposite beliefs. No one seemed to notice, but this forced me to really analyze myself and decide what I really believed in. As of now, I would consider myself a believer in both fate and free will.

I think that we have the ability to make our own choices, but the morality and righteousness of those choices determine our future. As the saying goes, "what goes around comes around", and I really believe that the universe has some weird way of punishing those who are unjust. I personally take great interest in science and math, areas in which those that are interested tend to argue against most religious and spiritual beliefs, like free will. Because of my interest in science, I have always been presented with a sort of internal contradiction.

Science proves that we descended from monkeys and that our bodies are simply made of atoms. Everything on earth is made of these atoms that work together in such a carefully crafted system; they are like machines, and how could machines make decisions of their own? This question has troubled me a lot. Logically, I should not believe in free will, but if I don't, what reason do I have to make decisions that I believe are right? If everything is done for us, what is the point of being a good person? What is the point of living at all?

Crime and terrorism make headlines every day. ISIS and al Qaeda are words in the vocabulary of eight-year-olds. I can’t enter my own school without a parking pass or student ID. Airports don’t even trust us with water. That is the world in which I live, in which we all live, and it has unfortunately become harder to see the good in it than it is to see the bad, and every day I try my hardest to see the good. I see what potential people have, what potential the world has. I dream of a bright future, not one dominated by evil, and if more people saw this, maybe it could become a reality. And don’t get me wrong - I’m not trying to look down upon the world from my bubble of happiness. I want people to realize that things don’t always have to be black and white. You don’t have to be a “hippie” of an optimist or a cynic. It’s okay to be in the middle. Sometimes it’s best to be in the middle. Sometimes it’s best to be a little gray.