Thank You For Being My Superhero, Dad

Thank You For Being My Superhero, Dad

Dad, through your inspiration, I grew up believing in myself. Thank you for helping shape who I am today.
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Dear Dad,

Thank you for being the best role model a girl could ask for

When I was born, you were just 26 years old, which is not much older than I am today. First, I want to thank you for everything that you’ve done and continue to do for me. I can’t begin to explain how grateful I am that I have you to look up to every day.

It’s not like when I was a child and thought you were some indestructible superhero who could take a bullet, but it is now a more realistic role model that I am still equally blessed to have.

I want to thank you for raising me the way you did. You taught me to have a sense of humor, manners, and most importantly, selflessness. You did everything you could to make sure I had the best childhood and were an excellent father. Words can’t explain how grateful I am to have you in my life.

Thank you for being there

Dad, I want to thank you for just being there. Even if we didn’t talk while seeing each other, I enjoyed your presence and still do. You were truly always there for every life obstacle, and I have to say you nailed the “dad role” you so strongly aspired to be.

You came to every long and boring dance recital. You played catch with me on weekends even though I was awful at it. You made sure to buy enough cookie dough so that I could win those overrated prizes for the school fundraisers.

It didn’t matter how small my goals were—you were always there to help me succeed or fail. There were plenty of those moments, and you were there to help me pick up the pieces. No matter how difficult it was to be a single dad, you never let your frustration show. I know I was a difficult child at times, so that had to take all the patience in the world.

Thank you for never letting me give up

Thank you so so so much for never letting me quit anything that I started. Though as a kid I hated band, choir, and many other activities/projects, you never let me give up. That life lesson has paid dividends and continues to each and every day.

Now, I don’t give up easily and owe that to you. I push harder each day to be the best me I can be and try to obtain my full potential. I hate to admit it when you’re right, but you usually are, and for this I say “you are right, Dad.”

Dad, through your inspiration, I grew up believing in myself. I grew up with a positive mindset. I grew up watching selflessness on a daily basis. Thank you for helping shape who I am today, and thank you for having a caring heart. Thank you for always being there. I am forever appreciative that you’re in my life. You are my dad, my biggest supporter, my friend, and my hero—all in one.

Cover Image Credit: Sydney Welch

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To The Girl Who Always Feels Left Out

Maybe next time...
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To the girl who always feels left out,

Girl, let me just tell you, I know the feeling. It feels as though my whole life, I have been that girl. You know that feeling when you are standing in a group of people and someone comes up and asks everyone to go to lunch in that group... But you?

Or they make it even worse by saying "Oh, I guess you can come too." You guess I can come to?

No, thank you.

At that point, you feel like the only reason you are being invited is that they feel like they have to. Which more than likely is actually the case. What about when you ask your friend to hang out and she can't because she will be doing homework all night? However, an hour later, you see her with your other best friend. Oh okay cool, sorry for bothering you with my friendship.

You know you are the girl who is always left out when you are the designated "photographer" or you have to specifically ask if you can take a picture with them because they are obviously done taking pictures and did not want one with you.

SEE ALSO: To The Girls Who 'Float' Between Friend Groups

We all know "Hey, will you take this picture of us?" all too well. Am I right, ladies? Oh yeah, it is fine. I hate being in pictures. I definitely hate taking pictures to remember this wonderful time I'm having.

What about when you and your friends discuss doing something later during the week and you ask about it but "It's probably not happening anymore." Then you check and would you look at that, your "friends" are having fun without you.

Shocker.

Oh but don't worry about it, I had things to do anyway. You know, clean the house, work on homework that is due next week, binge-watch The Office for the third time this week. Fun stuff. Oh and better yet when you see your friends are hanging out without you. The next time they see you, they talk about how much fun they had.

Oh yes, please tell me about how much fun you had without me. I totally enjoy hearing about how "I totally missed out" and "I should have come." Well, an invite would have been well appreciated. But maybe next time, right? Wrong.


Yeah, I know what you are thinking, "Wow this girl is being so petty." Well if you are thinking that, then you obviously do not know the feeling. And to think about it, you probably are not the one in the friend group who is being left out. So think about who that person is and make them feel included next time. It would be greatly appreciated. You do not know how much of a difference it could make.

Yes, I know everyone feels left out sometimes, but time after time, it starts to get really old. Then after you have to start inviting yourself to hang out with people, you realize well since they are not inviting me themselves, maybe they don't want me here. And then surprisingly, you stop hanging out with them. Hmmm, I wonder what could've possibly happened.


Yes, I know, most people do not do this on purpose. I am sure I have even done it once or twice without realizing it, and I am truly sorry.

From one left out girl to another,

Good Luck

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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The Shape Of The Monster: Depression

The second piece in a series about mental illness.

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views

The last thing I want to do is glorify mental illness, give it a platform, give it a name. But I need to talk about it, to work through it, to show that it's something many people experience.

It goes like this.

Hey! Sorry I haven't called you back. Everything has been so busy.

Every time I think about even picking up the phone and calling you, something heavy but familiar sets in my stomach like a weight.

You know how things get.

You know how easy it is to want to slip into absolute nothingness, right?

I've been trying to write, but my writer's block has been limiting me a lot.

Everything I write is so bad. The flow is off. It doesn't sound like me. It feels so crooked and wrong. I can't do anything right.

How are things? Has work been alright?

I hope you feel successful. I hope things are easier for you. I hope you are as happy as you seem.

I'm okay.

I don't want to be here. I don't want to be anywhere. I feel crooked and wrong like I just want to scream and cry and dissolve.

I've just been so tired!

I have been tired for at least a decade. Tired of never sleeping. Tired of never feeling anything more than either absolute devastation and absolute nothingness. Tired. Tired. Tired.

I hope I can see you soon.

I hope I can bring myself to get out of bed and out into the world. I hope I can force myself to shower, and get dressed, and be a contributor to society, to social obligations.

I miss you.

I miss you.

I love you.

I love you.

I promise to call as soon as things lighten up a bit.

As long as the chemical imbalance doesn't destroy me altogether, hopefully, I can feign vague interest for a short phone call.

Goodbye.

Goodbye for now, maybe goodbye forever, maybe I'll work up the courage to call you in another 2, 5, 7 weeks or so. My life is made of "maybes." Maybe one-day things will be better. Maybe one day I'll be happy. Maybe one day I won't be anything. Maybe.

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