As girls, we like to believe that we are the main person in our boyfriend's life. While that might be the case, there is one event in a relationship were this idea comes crashing down. This event is called pledgeship. 

At every school, in every fraternity, the traditions vary. However, it is unheard of to not have new members go through pledgeship. Intensity may vary, but this process has a huge effect, not only on the boys, but also on their girlfriends.      

Cute date nights are hard to come by, since you and he never know when he is going to get a call from an active asking for a ride or some other sort of favor. The majority of his time is now spent on winning over the actives, memorizing facts about the fraternity, or in a three-hour long meeting that teaches them about brotherhood.     

Finances become crazy, and he can barely afford to buy his own dinner -- let alone yours. You cannot blame him. Paying for booze for two to six parties a week, and buying actives dinner and drinks to gain votes, gets expensive. In the moment it may be hard to understand why you are no longer getting the royal treatment, but the benefits of dating a fraternity guy will pay off.      

Get ready for many nights when he comes home black out drunk. This comes partly from just learning the ropes of college, but also active members encouraging (not forcing) drinking. You will have to take care of him on more then one occasion and, then, the next morning he will ask what dumb things he did that night.     

The days of being his main priority are temporarily gone. For about the next three months he is hard-core man flirting and performing slave work for the older members of his chapter. It does not mean he cares any less about you. In fact, he probably needs you now more then ever. He probably feels unmanly being told what to do and, hey, no one can make a man feel more manly than a woman.

He will need you to be his cheerleader when it comes to schoolwork, pushing through the hell that is pledgeship and his conscience to remind him that just because he is in a frat does not mean he is better than anyone else. After initiation, he can finally take a breath and spend some quality time with you. Once again, you can be his main priority and start working on becoming his pledge class’ sweetheart.