How many of you have ever felt disgust in your own skin? Well, not necessarily disgust, but a form of depreciated self-worth none the least? May I have a show of hands? No one.? Not one? Well, I highly doubt that.

For me, I had a lot of moments where I didn’t enjoy being myself. Growing up was difficult enough being socially awkward and odd-looking. Now that I am older and not the same person I was, I have come to realize something about me that I think is beautiful, but others find offensive. I’m African American. What’s the big deal with that? I will gladly tell you.

Being a military child constantly on the move and around new people I didn’t have many negative experiences in my beautiful brown skin growing up apart from the occasional store owner following me out of suspicion. But, attending a historically black college or university such as Alcorn State University has really opened my eyes. The truth of the matter is, blacks aren’t respected.

African Americans are probably the least favorite group of people in America. People don’t like us, but they appear to want to be us. Not too long ago African Americans were ridiculed for having big defined lips, but when Angelina Jolie has those lips, everyone must have big lips. Cornrows were considered embarrassing and uncivilized, but when a Kardashian wears the hairstyle, “boxer braids” are the new black. In 2014, Marc Jacobs claimed he invented Bantu knots in a fashion show, rebranding them as “mini buns.” Seriously, can we not have credit for anything?

Blacks aren’t just disrespected in other communities, but from their own. I cannot tell you how many African American males I have met that don’t find their own women attractive. I have family members who believe it is okay to degrade African American women for the approval of Latinas or White women. The common trend is, “black women are too loud, aggressive and ungrateful,” which is a stereotype that applies to all women not just African American women.

I have met males who think the only way a Black woman can be beautiful is if she is mixed with something else. If she has an exotic look about her, she is gorgeous. In fact, people find it hard to believe that I’m not mixed because I have hazel eyes. Just consider the tiring dark skin versus light skin debate, it is the same thing.

What is wrong with having darker skin? What is wrong with being African American? Nothing. So why are we treated in such a horrible way? Why are African American women dubbed as undesirable? I don’t understand the problem.