Throughout your lifetime, you will find that there is a balance between being alone and being with other people that makes you feel most comfortable. In college, you will most likely be exposed to all ends of the spectrum.
One one hand, it can feel like you are sometimes forced to be alone, as it can be difficult to make friends and find people to do homework with. On the other hand, it can also feel like you are constantly forced to be around people-- during orientation, in class discussions, etc. What is important to note is that everyone has varying degrees of which they enjoy being alone, and in college, you will definitely find people of all variations.
As an introvert, being alone is sometimes my favorite parts of the day. I enjoy reading books alone, doing homework alone, working out alone, and sometimes eating dinner alone. Being alone does not necessarily mean that I am the only person in a room though. I enjoy that fact that there could be hundreds of people around me and I still get to do my own thing. I enjoy having quiet time to myself and doing things on my own time.
While I absolutely enjoy being with friends and having study dates and going out, I also appreciate the time that I have to relax and be by myself. I would say that this is roughly the middle of the spectrum.
There are also a good amount of people that prefer to do everything with friends. They find themselves more productive when they have people to talk to and bounce ideas off of. These are most likely the extroverts, as extroverts find their energy throughout the day comes from conversations with other people and activities with others. This is totally cool and another way of balancing school and social life.
In addition, there are people who would prefer to do everything by themselves and often struggle to do activities and homework with other people. They find it much easier to stay away from all distractions and get things done. They most likely communicate with friends through texting and very minimal activities. Though it might be a little more difficult to come across these people in college, they do exist and their lifestyle is completely okay as well.
I think these variations are important to note because as you work towards making friends and finding your own balance, it might be difficult to find someone who enjoys hanging out with friends as much as you do or finding someone who likes the idea of mainly texting and hanging out maybe once a week. It is okay if you don’t find your best friends in college in your first week, semester, or even year.
It is difficult to move to a brand new school with people you have never met and automatically find your BFF.
I just encourage you to think about where you might be on this spectrum and where others might lie as well. If someone doesn't want to hang out, it doesn’t mean necessarily that they don’t like you. And you do not have to go out every weekend just because your friend wants you to. Think about what suits you best, and go from there.
