Loneliness adds beauty to life. It puts a special burn on sunsets and makes night air smell better.
- Henry Rollins
As of late, I have found myself coping with something everyone, especially people in college, will encounter one time or another, and that's feeling lonely. The dictionary definition for loneliness is "affected with, characterized by, or causing a depressing feeling of being alone; lonesome." Sounds pretty terrible right? Now, imagine living it. It's a pretty rough time of life, and it seems almost impossible to overcome; however, there's s a lot we can do personally to fight the feeling.
First and foremost, there are a lot of causes to loneliness. Whether it being single to having no friends, they all equally hurt your pride. Honestly, feeling like you're the person in the world without someone to just simply keep you company really hurts, but there are glimmers of hope for us lonely-hearts. There is a huge difference between being alone and being lonely. Just because you're by yourself, doesn't mean you have to accept being lonely. You must take it into account how much you value your space. Personally, I enjoy time to myself and being alone. I love putting on my pajamas and relaxing in my room with popcorn watching Netflix. That's my kind of night; however, I often stop and wonder what it would be like to be in the company of others.
Being away from my family did teach me a lot about myself and learning to be ok with who I was; however, being away from them did make me feel alone. With a nonexistent love life, I began to feel as if the only shot I had at happiness was to be completely isolated from the world and take the time to myself. I felt hollowed out, but then I remembered who I was and what made me happy. Once, you begin to do the things that make you happy feeling lonely quickly takes a step back and becomes much-needed "me time."
Patience is also very vital in accepting being alone. Waiting for the right friend or special person to enter your life takes time, it is very difficult to accept. The person God has for us is out there, and we have to wait to until they reveal themselves and it's not an easy feat. In the meantime, it's important to surround yourself with people who share the same goals for you. If you want to find some peace in your life and to fight the feeling of loneliness, you absolutely must surround yourself with people who are only going to lift you higher.
Finding your inner happiness is also essential. When you find something that makes you proud to be you, loneliness becomes something of the past. The time and effort you put into making yourself happy takes away from the depressing feeling of being alone in big world. Simply finding something to occupy your time takes a lot of your sadness away. I strongly encourage prayer! An open relationship with God and an open sense of communication with Christ will change your heart on a lot of matters that you would've otherwise found yourself believing to be true about yourself.
Lastly, we must learn to view being alone as more than just isolation! Naturally, we want to be in the company of others, but our best concepts, ideas, and thoughts come from the times we spend with ourselves. Others can serve as a spring board for those ideas, but our time to ourselves serves as the best time for those ideas to flourish.
Being alone is tough, and I won't say that it'll get easier by the day, but the time you have to yourself can be used productively. Dealing with this myself, I understand the struggles that come along with it and I'm working to grow on my own. Being alone is apart of life and everyone should expect to experience it at some point, but being lonely is completely optional! Surround yourself with the things that make you happy, make ample use of your time, and work to find people whose goals for you are the same as yours! The days may seem long and lonesome but the journey will be well worth it!
