" You're so strong." "How do you do it?" "How are you so strong?" "You are always smiling." "You are always making me smile." "You are always happy."

If only you really knew, knew who I was behind closed doors. My emotions, you'll only see happiness. My feelings, you'll never know. Me, the real me, you will never know, you will never see, you will never meet.

I am not strong. My safe place is my room. I cry in silent and laugh in public. The real me is dark, scared, lost. I have lost myself, mentally, physically, and emotionally. But you, you will never know. I can present myself as a strong, non-broken, happy person. On the inside, I'm a mess, I'm hurting, I'm crying. I am so deep my silent cries for help are never picked up on.

Don't come in now that you've read this. You still don't have a clue of who the real me is. Don't say you know me. I don't even know myself. Don't feel for me. The me I want to be is blind to the real me. Thank you to those who caused me pain, I eventually become numb to it. My walls are thin but the real me is thick. The real me will never come out to play. Don't try looking for the real me, you will only find the cover up of the real me.