I understand that the Snapchat update is old news. However, I feel as if we never properly acknowledged the gravity of this change. I completely agree that it’s more convenient that we no longer have to press and hold in order to open a friend’s picture; I remember the thumb power that task required. I also understand the appeal of the "Discover Stories." So while this update has its perks, this article will not be focusing on those. Instead, I will be drawing attention to the absurdity of the new emoji system.
For those of you that have forgotten, it used to be that you could click on a friend’s name and there would be all you ever needed to know about that person -- their top three Snapchat best friends. This list revealed who your true friends were, and let’s be real, who was hooking up with who. There was also the occasional person with “no best friends :(” which always made me laugh because I’m incredibly immature. In reality, this person most likely spent their time actually interacting with other human beings instead of sending them double-chin selfies.
I cannot possibly be the only person that checked those lists religiously. If I was, well I’ll just say that you all are missing out because the best friend lists held some juicy information. Unfortunately, they’re all gone now.
The new Snapchat utilizes emojis, and I simply cannot handle it. Just when I think I have them all figured out, something new will pop up next to someone’s name. It’s like oh the smiley face smoking a cigar and wearing a top hat means that someone that viewed your Snapchat has also sent a Snapchat to your best friend’s best friend. It’s ridiculous, and I do not find worth in any of them. I mean, the bursting star means that the person you are Snapchatting has had a friend replay their snap. Oh. Umm. Who cares? Snapchat tends to disagree because when you press to replay, a little message pops up saying, “Do you want to replay this? It’s a huge compliment!” Yes I do want to replay this, but just because my sound wasn’t on.
Let’s talk about the "smirking face" emoji. This particular gem means that you are somebody’s best friend, but they aren’t one of yours. You feel pretty cool when you have one of these emojis pop up, but it also makes you constantly fear whether or not you are the dreaded smirking face on someone else’s account. There’s also the sunglasses emoji which apparently means that you and this person share a mutual best friend. Once again, who cares? If you have a friend group of more than a SINGLE other human being, chances are your friends might overlap on Snapchat.
In short, I am more than willing to spearhead the movement to bring back the best friends list. I just want us all to be able to go back to what we do best: stalking!
